Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: metal

METALLICA: Because Las Vegas Wasn’t Loud Enough, Here Come Six More Shows to Melt Your Ears at the Sphere
Hold Onto Your Mosh Pits, Nerds: METALLICA Is Coming to Sphere, and Your Bank Account Will Never Recover
Breaking, Music News

METALLICA: Because Las Vegas Wasn’t Loud Enough, Here Come Six More Shows to Melt Your Ears at the Sphere

Chord F. DiscordMarch 2, 2026March 2, 2026

Oh look, another announcement that’s going to make every metalhead with disposable income hyperventilate. METALLICA, those delightful four horsemen of…

Headbanging Their Way to Eurovision Glory: LAVINA Rocks Serbia’s Spot in 2026 Eurotrash Extravaganza
Breaking, Music News

Headbanging Their Way to Eurovision Glory: LAVINA Rocks Serbia’s Spot in 2026 Eurotrash Extravaganza

Chord F. DiscordMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

Oh look, another “modern” metal band from the Balkans, because apparently Europe hasn’t had enough of those. But hey, at…

FEAR FACTORY’s DINO CAZARES SHUTS DOOR ON Ex-Members: ‘Chapter Closed Forever, No Key Under Mat’
FEAR FACTORY's Dino Cazares is done with his ex-bandmates, and he wants everyone to know it—preferably without getting angry emails about it
Breaking, Music News

FEAR FACTORY’s DINO CAZARES SHUTS DOOR ON Ex-Members: ‘Chapter Closed Forever, No Key Under Mat’

Chord F. DiscordMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

FEAR FACTORY’s founding guitarist Dino Cazares has officially closed the door on working with any former members of the band,…

BEHEMOTH’s Bangkok Concert: Where Even The Gods Of Death Metal Were Like “Bruh, That’s Too Much”
BEHEMOTH Brings the Fire (and Blasphemy) to Bangkok, While India Cowers in Fear
Breaking, Music News

BEHEMOTH’s Bangkok Concert: Where Even The Gods Of Death Metal Were Like “Bruh, That’s Too Much”

Chord F. DiscordMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

Well, well, well, look who decided to grace Thailand with their unholy presence! BEHEMOTH, the Polish black/death metal titans who’ve…

Cephalotripsy in Houston, TX (02/28/2026)
Videos

Cephalotripsy in Houston, TX (02/28/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 28, 2026

Slam/Brutal Death Metal from San Diego, California Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The…

Saturnus in Gdansk, Poland (02/28/2026)
Videos

Saturnus in Gdansk, Poland (02/28/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 28, 2026

Melodic Doom/Death Metal from Denmark Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

Stabbing in Houston, TX (02/28/2026)
Videos

Stabbing in Houston, TX (02/28/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 28, 2026

Brutal Death Metal from Texas Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

Necrogilistic Anomaly in Houston, TX (02/28/2026)
Videos

Necrogilistic Anomaly in Houston, TX (02/28/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 28, 2026

Brutal Death from Houston, Texas Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

Coagulated in Houston, TX (02/28/2026)
Videos

Coagulated in Houston, TX (02/28/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 28, 2026

Brutal Death from Texas Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,”…

Paradise Lost in Gdansk, Poland (02/28/2026)
Videos

Paradise Lost in Gdansk, Poland (02/28/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 28, 2026

Doom/Gothic Metal from United Kingdom Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 38 39 40 … 152 Next

Latest posts

  • Phil Anselmo Finally Not Screaming On New Down Album Miracles Happen
  • Oh Joy Another Chance to Watch a 30 Year Old Anime Film on a Format That’s Older Than Most of the Audience While Paying Exorbitant Cinema Prices to Relive the Experience of Scratches and Flicker on a Big Screen
  • Paris Hilton Demands the World Revolve Around Her Questionable Fashion Sense Again
  • AC/DC 2026 Tour Ticket Prices Revealed
  • Queens of the Stone Age Drop New Track Easy Street

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}