European Metal Festivals Be Like
SPF 50 wasn't enough Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,”…
Tag: metal
Bulletboys Reunite Because Your Midlife Crisis Needs Soundtrack
I just spilled my beer all over my Iron Maiden t-shirt because I’m so shocked… just kidding, I’m not that…
Blaze Bayley desperate to crash Iron Maiden’s Hall of Fame party
Oh boy, you guys, it’s finally happening! Former IRON MAIDEN singer Blaze Bayley is going to be inducted into the…
Bodom Reunion Because Your Midlife Crisis Needs More Power Chords
Get ready for a serious dose of Finnish metal, because CHILDREN OF BODOM is back… kind of. The band will…
Every Morning After a Metal Show
The memories were priceless. The bar tab wasn't. 🍺💸 Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world…
Never Hand the Mic to a Metalhead 🤘
Every metal vocalist has met this guy Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The…
Behemoth is Taking a Whole Year Off to Recover from Nergal’s Ego Exhaustion
Breaking News: Behemoth Announces They’re Not Going to Tour as Much, and Honestly, Who Didn’t See This Coming? 🙄 In…
Flesh Carving in Charlotte, NC (06/25/2026)
Deathcore from North Carolina Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,”…
Snake Father in Charlotte, NC (06/25/2026)
Downtempo beatdown deathcore from Austin, Texas Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan…
I Am Mook in Charlotte, NC (06/25/2026)
Deathcore/metal from Jacksonville, North Carolina Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…