Symphony X Launches Highly Anticipated (by Whom?) 2025 North American Tour in Stroudsburg, PA (Seriously?)
SYMPHONY X, the geriatric prog metal dinosaurs 🦖, lumbered onto the stage last night (or whenever it was – who…
Tag: metal
Sebastian Bach Swears on a Stack of Leather Pants He Won’t Let Robots Steal His Screams
OMG! 😱 Sebastian Bach, the vocal gymnast from that band your mom liked, SKID ROW (yeah, that one), has some…
Dave Lombardo’s New Coffee: Guaranteed to Make You Drum FASTER (Probably Not)
Okay, so apparently, Dave Lombardo, the dude who hits drums REALLY fast, is now selling coffee. Yes, THAT Dave Lombardo.…
Judas Priest’s Rob Halford, the Metal God, spills the tea on Ozzy’s impending doom
So, like, Rob Halford, the Metal God (yeah, right 😂), sat down with some dude named Jonathan Clarke on some…
Hideo Kojima Says MGSV Was “Unfinished” – No Duh
OMG! 😱 Did Kojima JUST admit Metal Gear Solid V was a total dumpster fire 🔥? You won’t BELIEVE this!…
Revenge from Hell: Ozzy Osbourne’s Ghost Orchestrates Fecal Bombing of Roger Waters’ Mansion
In a world where aging rock stars have long since traded cocaine and groupies for organic fennel tea and angry…
SABATON’s Got a Bridge, Get Over It
Oh, glorious day! The Swedish Eurovision rejects, SABATON, are gracing Europe with their presence in November 2025 for a “20-city…
System of a Down in Chicago, Il (09/01/2025)
Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports…
Avenged Sevenfold in Chicago, Il (09/01/2025)
Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports…
Polyphia in Chicago, Il (09/01/2025)
Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports…