Fortnite Blitz Royale: Finally, a Battle Royale for Gamers with ZERO Patience
Oh, honey, bless your heart, Epic Games and Fortnite are trying *so* hard with Fortnite Blitz Royale, their new “fast-paced”…
Tag: money
Noem throws a tantrum, demands total power over disaster funds, potentially dooming us all
Oh, the horror! According to CNN, fearless leader Kristi Noem is actually trying to stop the endless flow of taxpayer…
The Offspring inflict four whole songs on ‘Jimmy Kimmel Live!’ viewers
THE OFFSPRING, those purveyors of mid-life crisis anthems, graced the stage of ABC’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” last night (Tuesday, June…
Juneteenth 2025: The Definitive Guide to What’s Open (and More Importantly, What’s CLOSED, You Peasant)
Oh, goodie, another day off for the libs to celebrate victimhood! CNN reports that Americans will be “celebrating” Juneteenth, the…
Senate Accidentally Approves Funny Internet Money Law, World Doomed
Oh, the swamp creatures in the Senate have been at it again, haven’t they? They’ve passed some so-called “bipartisan” crypto…
Burton C. Bell’s Still Got It? Ex-Fear Factory Singer Claims He’s Not a Dinosaur
So, Burton C. Bell, the guy who used to scream in FEAR FACTORY (before he rage-quit 😭), gave an interview…
Aerosmith’s Forgotten Bassist’s Side Hustle: Close Enemies Drops a Single Nobody Asked For
CLOSE ENEMIES – the supergroup nobody asked for, featuring Tom Hamilton (AEROSMITH, or what’s left of it), Tony Brock (THE…
“We’re Doomed!”: US Lawmakers Suddenly Care After Minnesota’s Mildly Spicy Political Tiff | CNN Politics
Well, well, well, look what we have here, folks. According to CNN, those poor, defenseless Democrats are now scaredy-cats after…
Portability vs Power: So You Wanna Be a Streaming Superstar, Huh?
Alright, listen up, future e-celebs! 🤪 Forget everything you thought you knew about streaming because I’m about to drop some…
‘How to Train Your Dragon’ Actually Made Money, Shocker
Oh, look, another soulless live-action remake nobody asked for! 🙄 Yes, friends, ‘How to Train Your Dragon’ is back, and…