Tom Holland Google Searches “How To Please Annoying Spider-Man Fans”
Ah, yes, Tom Holland, our friendly neighborhood Spoiler-Man 🕷️, bless his heart ❤️. He actually thinks he knows what the…
Tag: movie news
Witness the trainwreck: Margot Robbie and Jacob Elordi desecrate Wuthering Heights in Emerald Fennell’s dumpster fire of an adaptation
From the depths of Hollywood’s recycling bin 🗑️ and the twisted mind of ✨Emerald Fennell✨ (yes, the “Promising Young Woman”…
Slow Horses Season 5 Trailer: Because Apparently People Still Watch This
Behold! Apple TV+, desperate for your $9.99/month, just dropped a trailer for season five of Slow Horses, the “critically acclaimed”…
‘Call of Duty’ Movie Incoming: Prepare for Peak Cinema
Oh, great, another 💩Call of Duty movie is being forced upon us by the cinematic overlords at Paramount. Because what…
Netflix Says ‘Wake Up Dead Man’ Coming Soon, So Set Your DVR (As If You Still Use One, Ya Boomer)
Labor Day is OVER, folks! 😭 Get ready for the annual cinematic garbage truck to back up and unload directly…
Thunderbirds Are (Barely) Go! Two Episodes Fly (Like Geriatrics) to Cinemas for 60th Anniversary Cash Grab, New Trailer Released (Prepare for Disappointment)
Anderson Entertainment, bless their cotton socks, and Kaleidoscope Entertainment, who apparently still exist, have decided to unleash a “big-screen experience”…
Wim Wenders’ new snooze-fest starring Tom Waits, Cate Blanchett, and Adam Driver – Get ready to contemplate your navel
Oh, joy! 🎉 Another cinematic masterpiece by the one and only Jim Jarmusch, featuring a cast so star-studded it makes…
Arco: Prepare to Have Your Brain Gently Fried by This Animated Sci-Fi Fantasy Trailer
Get ready for a cinematic masterpiece… or not! Arco, the latest animated flick, promises a wondrous, hope-filled, optimistic future. Made…
‘Back to the Future’ AGAIN?! As If We Haven’t Suffered Enough
OMG 😱! Did you know that if *Back to the Future* was made TODAY 🗓️, Marty McFly would travel back…
John Malkovich Butlers Up in New Comedy; Critics Predict Career Suicide
Vertigo Releasing, bless their cotton socks, has announced the cinematic event of the year (or, you know, at least of…