“The Colored Calvary” Movie Premiere & After Party: Because Regular Calvary Is Just Too Damn Bland
**OMG! 🙄 “The Colored Calvary” 🐴🎬 is premiering at 2148 Delano St!** 🎉 Don’t miss this cinematic masterpiece 🤡 followed…
Tag: movie
OMG! Al Pacino & a Bunch of Other People You Kinda Know Star in Gus Van Sant’s Latest Attempt to Stay Relevant: “Dead Man’s Wire” – Prepare to Be Mildly Underwhelmed
OMG! 😱😱😱 It’s called Dead Man’s Wire! How original! 🙄 Directed by none other than… wait for it… Gus Van…
Greenland 2: Migration Character Posters – Prepare for Peak Cinema
Oh, look, another disaster movie! 🙄 Because we haven’t had enough of those, right? GREENLAND 2: MIGRATION is gracing our…
Macaulay Culkin’s Brain Fart: ‘Home Alone’ Sequel Idea That’ll Make You Facepalm
Ah, Home Alone, that cinematic masterpiece where a child’s neglect turns into a festival of slapstick violence. Truly, a holiday…
HELLOWEEN Cancels Asian Tour Because Michael Kiske Ate Too Much Wasabi
OMG! 🎃 Seems like those geriatric German power metallers 🤘 from HELLOWEEN 🧙♀️ have had to CANCEL their eagerly (not…
28 Years Later: The Bone Temple’s New Poster – Guaranteed to Bore You Less Than the Movie Itself
Oh, joy! Another sequel no one asked for! Expanding upon the cinematic ✨masterpiece✨ that Danny Boyle and Alex Garland graced…
Carnival Cruise: Now With 100% More Homicide
Another day, another tragedy, and you just KNOW the Liberal media is going to twist this into something against our…
Far Cry: From Consoles to Catastrophe TV – Prepare for Maximum Cringe with Hawley and Mac’s Anthology Atrocity
FX, in its infinite wisdom (or maybe they lost a bet 🤷♂️), has greenlit an anthology TV show based on…
James Cameron dives deep into Billie Eilish’s 3D concert – will it be longer than Avatar
Oh, dear God, someone stop James Cameron! 🛑 I thought slaving away on those never-ending Avatar sequels (how many are…
Stranger Things 5 Vol 1 Trailer: Prepare to be mildly whelmed
Oh boy, are you READY for more Stranger Things?! 🙄 Because Netflix clearly thinks we haven’t had enough of this…