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Tag: News

Dead by Daylight Summons Geriatric Zombie Killers: Rick, Michonne, and Daryl Shuffle Uneasily into The Fog
Breaking, Games News

Dead by Daylight Summons Geriatric Zombie Killers: Rick, Michonne, and Daryl Shuffle Uneasily into The Fog

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 8, 2025July 8, 2025

Oh, great, more content for Dead by Daylight. As if we needed more reasons to get camped in the basement.…

OMG! Witkoff Predicts Gaza Ceasefire by Next Week, While Trump and Bibi Plan World Domination
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Witkoff Predicts Gaza Ceasefire by Next Week, While Trump and Bibi Plan World Domination

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2025July 8, 2025

Another day, another attempt by the Fake News CNN to undermine President Trump’s brilliant foreign policy! Steve Witkoff, a true…

Inflation is Tame, Markets are High, But Orange Man Bad Because Tariffs
Elephant Reads CNN

Inflation is Tame, Markets are High, But Orange Man Bad Because Tariffs

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2025July 8, 2025

Oh, the Fake News is at it again! CNN, still whining about President Trump’s booming economy. “US stocks have rocketed…

From Bratwurst to Boat Ride: American Screw-Up Gets Kicked to Jamaica
Elephant Reads CNN

From Bratwurst to Boat Ride: American Screw-Up Gets Kicked to Jamaica

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2025July 8, 2025

Another day, another sob story from CNN, folks! This time, it’s about Jermaine Thomas, a “poor” fella deported to Jamaica.…

Opus Major Drops MAJJAM: Prepare for Co-Op Cuteness Overload and Catchy Tunes That Will Haunt Your Dreams
Breaking, Games News

Opus Major Drops MAJJAM: Prepare for Co-Op Cuteness Overload and Catchy Tunes That Will Haunt Your Dreams

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 8, 2025July 8, 2025

Oh, sweet merciful indie game gods, Opus Major (who?) has graced us with MAJJAM, a co-op adventure game where apparently,…

Dead by Daylight and Walking Dead Team Up to Traumatize You More
Breaking, Games News

Dead by Daylight and Walking Dead Team Up to Traumatize You More

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, look, another Dead by Daylight crossover. 🙄 Because what this game REALLY needs is MORE content instead of, you…

Pam Bondi’s Epic Fail: Epstein File Fiasco a Comedy of Errors
Elephant Reads CNN

Pam Bondi’s Epic Fail: Epstein File Fiasco a Comedy of Errors

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Another day, another attempt by the Fake News CNN to undermine our glorious President Trump! They whine that the Trump…

Nintendo Panics: Desperate Measures to Keep You From Starving After Buying Our Games
Breaking, Games News

Nintendo Panics: Desperate Measures to Keep You From Starving After Buying Our Games

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, sweet innocent gamers, gather ’round! Uncle Nintendo, bless his heart, is here to soothe your fragile wallets regarding the…

CNN: Justice Department Says Epstein Did Himself In, No Juicy Client List to See Here, Folks
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Justice Department Says Epstein Did Himself In, No Juicy Client List to See Here, Folks

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

The Justice Department, under the iron fist of President Trump, is now saying there’s no “client list” from that scumbag…

Matt Cameron FINALLY Escapes Pearl Jam After Torturous 27-Year Sentence
Breaking, Music News

Matt Cameron FINALLY Escapes Pearl Jam After Torturous 27-Year Sentence

Chord F. DiscordJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Breaking News! 🚨 Matt Cameron, the guy who hits things in PEARL JAM, has finally realized he’s been playing the…

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  • AI stocks tanking again because tech bubble popping maybe
  • You won’t believe what’s melting down today besides Europe
  • Million Plus Immigrants Freaking Out Thanks To Supreme Court
  • CNN thinks Iran deal is already a total win what’s next
  • Oh great now ships are sneaking through Hormuz

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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