Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Songs

NANCY WILSON’S LAST HEART ALBUM: THE VICTORY LAP BEGINS IN 2027 (BECAUSE 2026 WAS TOO SOON)
HEART's Nancy Wilson: "I've Got Songs, But I'm Also Tired of Sleeping on Tour Buses"
Breaking, Music News

NANCY WILSON’S LAST HEART ALBUM: THE VICTORY LAP BEGINS IN 2027 (BECAUSE 2026 WAS TOO SOON)

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 14, 2026February 14, 2026

In a shocking twist that absolutely no one saw coming, HEART guitarist Nancy Wilson has revealed she’s working on new…

W.A.S.P. Unleashes ‘1984 To Headless’ 2026 North American Tour Featuring KK’S PRIEST: Prepare for a Rock ‘n’ Roll Apocalypse!
W.A.S.P. Announces 1984 To Headless Tour With KK'S PRIEST — Because Nothing Says 'Rock Legacy' Like Reliving Your First Four Albums For The 87th Time
Breaking, Live, Music News

W.A.S.P. Unleashes ‘1984 To Headless’ 2026 North American Tour Featuring KK’S PRIEST: Prepare for a Rock ‘n’ Roll Apocalypse!

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 11, 2026February 11, 2026

Breaking news from the world of “please clap”: W.A.S.P. has announced the “1984 To Headless” 2026 U.S. and Canada Tour…

BEHEMOTH Blasts Turkey: ‘They Canceled Our Concert Because Apparently Metalheads Are Too Metal For Their Metal’
BEHEMOTH's Satanic Saga: Banned in Turkey Because Apparently Heavy Metal Is More Dangerous Than Actual Evil
Breaking

BEHEMOTH Blasts Turkey: ‘They Canceled Our Concert Because Apparently Metalheads Are Too Metal For Their Metal’

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 11, 2026February 11, 2026

Oh no! The poor, misunderstood, totally-innocent BEHEMOTH has been canceled in Turkey. The horror! The tragedy! The absolute injustice of…

MASTERPLAN Drops ‘Chase The Light’ Single From Upcoming ‘Metalmorphosis’ Album – Because Apparently, Metal Needs a Glow-Up
Masterplan Finally Returns With "Metalmorphosis" After 12-Year Hiatus
Breaking, Music News

MASTERPLAN Drops ‘Chase The Light’ Single From Upcoming ‘Metalmorphosis’ Album – Because Apparently, Metal Needs a Glow-Up

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 10, 2026February 10, 2026

After what feels like an eternity (okay, 12 years), German power metal veterans Masterplan are finally gracing us with a…

KREATOR’s MILLE PETROZZA Too Cool for Thrash: “Boring Album? Not in My Heart, Dude!”
Breaking, Music News

KREATOR’s MILLE PETROZZA Too Cool for Thrash: “Boring Album? Not in My Heart, Dude!”

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 10, 2026February 10, 2026

Oh look, it’s KREATOR, the German thrash metal institution that refuses to die since the ’80s! Mille Petrozza just dropped…

A Book About Canadian Death/Thrash/Crossover Pioneers SLAUGHTER Is Coming to Remind You That Yes, Canada Has More Than Maple Syrup and Apologies
Breaking, Music News

A Book About Canadian Death/Thrash/Crossover Pioneers SLAUGHTER Is Coming to Remind You That Yes, Canada Has More Than Maple Syrup and Apologies

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 9, 2026February 9, 2026

Attention, all you underground metal geeks and tape-trading nerds — gather ’round for the literary event of the century (or…

MATT SORUM On Being Inducted Into ROCK HALL With GUNS N’ ROSES: ‘It Was Sort Of Unimaginable’ And ‘Kind Of A Shock’
Oh look, Matt Sorum finally remembered what the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame is!
Breaking, Music News

MATT SORUM On Being Inducted Into ROCK HALL With GUNS N’ ROSES: ‘It Was Sort Of Unimaginable’ And ‘Kind Of A Shock’

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 9, 2026February 9, 2026

In early January, former GUNS N’ ROSES and VELVET REVOLVER drummer Matt Sorum sat down for an interview with WCZR…

JOHN TARDY Says OBITUARY Plans To Brainstorm Album Ideas For 2027—Because Who Needs Urgency?
Breaking, Music News

JOHN TARDY Says OBITUARY Plans To Brainstorm Album Ideas For 2027—Because Who Needs Urgency?

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 7, 2026February 7, 2026

Oh, look, John Tardy has ideas for a new album. Eventually. Maybe. 🪦🎸 In a world where bands drop albums…

SODOM’s TOM ANGELRIPPER Whines About U.S. Show Costs: ‘Guess We Can’t Afford Your Cheap Beer’
Breaking, Music News

SODOM’s TOM ANGELRIPPER Whines About U.S. Show Costs: ‘Guess We Can’t Afford Your Cheap Beer’

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 4, 2026February 4, 2026

Thomas “Angelripper” Such, the grizzled veteran of German thrash metal, has finally admitted what we all knew deep down: being…

SLIPKNOT’s Secret 2008 Album ‘Look Outside Your Window’ Finally Emerges From the Basement in April Because the Band Got Bored of Waiting
SLIPKNOT Fans Finally Get to Hear the "Lost Album" That Wasn't Even That Lost
Breaking, Music News

SLIPKNOT’s Secret 2008 Album ‘Look Outside Your Window’ Finally Emerges From the Basement in April Because the Band Got Bored of Waiting

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 4, 2026February 4, 2026

Well, well, well… Looks like the boys in the masks have finally decided to stop hoarding their “secret stash” of…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 15 16 17 … 35 Next

Latest posts

  • Nation’s Iconic Reflecting Pool Takes Brief Vacation
  • Ariana Grande Plays Barclays Center Get Last Minute Tickets Now
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: President DJT claims vandalism caused Reflecting Pool damage
  • RuneScape dusts off player housing with fresh coat of monetization paint
  • Alex Skolnick Thinks Angus Young Is Good Or Something

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}