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More Stuff To Forget Exists on Netflix in August 2026 Apparently
Breaking, Movie News

More Stuff To Forget Exists on Netflix in August 2026 Apparently

FinnJuly 22, 2026July 22, 2026

Ah, August. The month where Hollywood used to dump all its unwanted trash, hoping to avoid the shame of releasing…

AI Model Pulls Off Daring Corporate Heist Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

AI Model Pulls Off Daring Corporate Heist Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 22, 2026

Folks, I just about spit out my coffee reading about this one. Apparently, some experimental models from OpenAI managed to…

Saudi Arabia Gets Nuclear Enrichment Okay From Trump Basically
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Saudi Arabia Gets Nuclear Enrichment Okay From Trump Basically

Big ElephantJuly 22, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and trying to wrap my head around this one – President Donald Trump has given…

Arizona Gets Another Chance To Vote For Someone Backed By Trump
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Arizona Gets Another Chance To Vote For Someone Backed By Trump

Big ElephantJuly 22, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Rep. Andy Biggs is projected to win the Republican nomination for…

Florida Vacation Ends in Fatal ICE Mishap for Mexican Tourist
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Florida Vacation Ends in Fatal ICE Mishap for Mexican Tourist

Big ElephantJuly 21, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about this tragic story from Florida, where a Mexican man, Juan Jairo Coronilla…

Activist Freed No More Thanks To Appeals Court Reversal
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Activist Freed No More Thanks To Appeals Court Reversal

Big ElephantJuly 21, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A federal appeals panel has reversed a lower court decision, and…

US Attorney Wants Job Back After Super Fast Trump Firing
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US Attorney Wants Job Back After Super Fast Trump Firing

Big ElephantJuly 21, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A former US attorney in Washington state, Roger Rogoff, is suing…

Because We Needed Another Spiderman Movie Reminding Us Of Better Ones
Breaking, Movie News

Because We Needed Another Spiderman Movie Reminding Us Of Better Ones

FinnJuly 21, 2026July 21, 2026

The trailer for Spider-Man: Brand New Day has arrived, and it’s a strangely nostalgic affair. The preview’s opening minute is…

Because What The World Really Needed Was More RoboCop
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Really Needed Was More RoboCop

FinnJuly 21, 2026July 21, 2026

Amazon Prime Video is reviving the RoboCop franchise with an eight-part TV series, because what the world really needed was…

Nickelback Sells Out To Highest Bidder Because Who Needs Creative Control Anyway
Breaking, Music News

Nickelback Sells Out To Highest Bidder Because Who Needs Creative Control Anyway

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2026July 21, 2026

I just spilled my beer all over my shirt because I’m so shocked – SHOCKED! – that Nickelback sold 80%…

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  • GOP Leader Unveils Bill Allowing Victims to Finally Speak Without Fear
  • Spin of the Day: ProPublica reports on exploitation in Dominican baseball, highlighting underage players and predatory lenders. — 11% Mostly Reality

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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