Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Woke

Wall Street Freaks Out Over Zillow Hack: Is Your McMansion Data Safe?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Wall Street Freaks Out Over Zillow Hack: Is Your McMansion Data Safe?

Big ElephantNovember 23, 2025November 23, 2025

Oh, the Horror! Wall Street Data Breach – Probably Hillary’s Emails, Again! I bet it was Crooked Hillary again. Or…

Ex-UVA Student Scores 5 Life Sentences: Touchdown of Justice or Epic Fail?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Ex-UVA Student Scores 5 Life Sentences: Touchdown of Justice or Epic Fail?

Big ElephantNovember 23, 2025November 23, 2025

Another day, another tragedy fueled by the leftist agenda infiltrating our universities! A former UVA student, Christopher Darnell Jones Jr.,…

Trump’s Genius Plan to Defund Cities Backfires Spectacularly, Judges Say “Nah, Bro”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Genius Plan to Defund Cities Backfires Spectacularly, Judges Say “Nah, Bro”

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Two activist judges, probably card-carrying members of the Socialist Party, have decided they know better than President Trump when it…

Cargo Ship Throws Fiery Tantrum at Port of Los Angeles, Everyone Freaks Out
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Cargo Ship Throws Fiery Tantrum at Port of Los Angeles, Everyone Freaks Out

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Another day, another disaster courtesy of the Lib-controlled Port of Los Angeles! You just KNOW this fire on the One…

Murdaugh Murders: CNN Asks If Hulu’s Fiction Is *Actually* More Real Than Reality
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Murdaugh Murders: CNN Asks If Hulu’s Fiction Is *Actually* More Real Than Reality

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Another day, another leftist propaganda piece masquerading as “entertainment”! Hulu’s “Murdaugh: Death in the Family” is out, and it’s just…

Beyonce’s Publicist: Black? Groundbreaking | CNN
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Beyonce’s Publicist: Black? Groundbreaking | CNN

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Oh, CNN, always chasing those hard-hitting stories! Apparently, the fact that Beyonce’s publicist is Black is groundbreaking news now. I…

ICE Morons Mistake Innocent Intern for International Espionage Extraordinaire, RI Officials Riot
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

ICE Morons Mistake Innocent Intern for International Espionage Extraordinaire, RI Officials Riot

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Folks, can you believe the liberal outrage machine is at it again? It seems ICE dared to do their job…

New Jersey Sports Betting Case Reveals Geriatric Mob’s Hilarious Attempt to Fleece Zoomers with Stone Age Tactics
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

New Jersey Sports Betting Case Reveals Geriatric Mob’s Hilarious Attempt to Fleece Zoomers with Stone Age Tactics

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Folks, can you believe it? The Deep State’s at it again, this time trying to make it look like organized…

Oops, America’s Flights Go Bye-Bye, Prepare for Wallet-Shredding Ticket Prices and Passenger Pandemonium
Elephant Reads CNN

Oops, America’s Flights Go Bye-Bye, Prepare for Wallet-Shredding Ticket Prices and Passenger Pandemonium

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Another government shutdown? You can bet your bottom dollar this is the Democrats’ fault, and those Deep State saboteurs are…

Florida Eviction Party Gets a Tad Too Wild: Deputy Down, Shooter and Friends Feeling Kinda Owchie
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Florida Eviction Party Gets a Tad Too Wild: Deputy Down, Shooter and Friends Feeling Kinda Owchie

Big ElephantNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

Another Day, Another Socialist Snowflake Meltdown! A Florida sheriff’s deputy, a true American hero, was KILLED while serving an eviction…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 26 27 28 … 95 Next

Latest posts

  • !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Bryan Kohberger Gets Two Whole Hearings to Maybe Not Be Guilty
  • GTA VI Adds Character Customization And Relationship Options
  • Gone With The Wind Makes 4K Ultra HD Debut
  • The Power of 3 Supergroup Drops Debut With Two New Singles
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Democrats reject Save America Act requiring photo ID and citizenship proof

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.