SABATON’s New Stage Show: So Big, It Probably Violates Several Building Codes
SABATON, those Swedish metallers who haven’t figured out that history is, like, *totally* boring, decided to unleash their “The Legendary…
Author: Chord F. Discord
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could "play the kazoo in four languages."
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
The Offspring, bless their hearts, are playing a HUGE outdoor gig in London’s Crystal Palace Park with some, uh, “special” guests
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because those geriatric punk posers THE OFFSPRING (yes, *still* around) are gracing London’s Crystal Palace Park…
Bush Joins Alter Bridge’s Blackbird Fest in Wales: Prepare for Nostalgia Overload
ALTER BRIDGE, those lovable purveyors of… well, whatever it is they do, just dropped a bombshell 💣, folks! Prepare yourselves,…
LITA FORD Claims She ‘Invented’ Being a Solo Artist After That Band Everyone Forgot About
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because Lita Ford, our resident queen of hairspray and questionable decisions, just dropped some truth bombs…
BREAKING: Old Dude From Whitesnake Finally Realizes He’s Old, Quits
OMG! 😱 David Coverdale, the dude who basically invented hairspray and skintight jeans, has officially retired! 👴🎸 Say it ain’t…
UNPROCESSED Announces Spring 2026 North American Tour (Get Your Tickets Now Before They Sell Out… Never), BLABBERMOUTH.NET Presale (Because You Have No Friends to Get You a Code)
OMG! 🙄 Those guys from UNPROCESSED – yes, the band you’ve never heard of – are gracing North America with…
Ex-BUTCHER BABIES Singer’s New Band, THE VIOLENT HOUR, Drops a Music Video So Bad It’ll Make You Want ‘Sex And Cigarettes’
OMG 🙄, THE VIOLENT HOUR, which is basically BUTCHER BABIES 2.0 but without the other chick, fronted by former BUTCHER…
RAVEN Does METALLICA’s ‘Metal Militia’ – Prepare for Pigeon Mayhem from ‘Tribute to Kill ‘Em All (Again?)’
Silver Lining Music, apparently unaware of the sheer audacity of their actions, will be unleashing “No Life ‘Til Leather –…
Power Trip 2.0: Now With Extra Cheeeeeese
Oh, sweet baby Jeebus, they’re back! POWER TRIP, the Texan thrashers who were last seen… well, you know 💀. Guitarist…
EPICA’s Asian Tour Gets the Boot ‘Cause Simone’s Feeling Kinda Meh
OMG! 😱 You won’t BELIEVE this! EPICA, those symphonic metal darlings who peaked like, a decade ago, are POSTPONING their…