Attention, all you underground metal geeks and tape-trading nerds — gather ’round for the literary event of the century (or at least the decade): a book about SLAUGHTER. No, not the hairspray-drenched, power-ballad-belting, ’90s MTV darlings. We’re talking about the real SLAUGHTER — the Scarborough, Ontario chainsaw-wielding, death/thrash/crossover lunatics who made your favorite underground bands sound like nursery rhymes.
In a move that will surely cause record collectors to simultaneously soil themselves with joy and frantically check eBay prices, two longtime SLAUGHTER superfans — Dragan “Ed” Balog (a man with more band affiliations than a LinkedIn profile) and Nick Sagias (who apparently has enough side projects to fill a festival lineup) — are penning a book titled “Tales From The Chainsaw”. Scheduled for release in late 2026 or early 2027, this literary masterpiece promises to be the ultimate love letter to a band that made Satan himself consider wearing earplugs.
For those of you who think SLAUGHTER is just something that happens to chickens, let’s rewind to 1984-1986, when this trio of Canadian lunatics — Terry Sadler, Dave Hewson, and Ron Sumners (the man, the myth, the chainsaw-wielding machine) — decided to take thrash metal, inject it with pure chaos, and release it upon an unsuspecting world. Their 1985 demo, “Surrender Or Die”, wasn’t just a collection of songs — it was a declaration of war against clean production, melody, and your grandmother’s peace of mind. And let’s not forget “Strappado” (1987), the album that made Napalm Death think, “Maybe we should tone it down a bit.”
But wait — there’s more! In 2000, some intrepid archaeologist of noise uncovered the “FOD (Fuck Of Death)” rehearsals from 1986, featuring none other than Chuck Schuldiner of DEATH/MANTAS fame. Yes, that’s right — for a brief, glorious moment, the father of death metal himself wielded a guitar in SLAUGHTER. The riffs were probably so heavy they caused structural damage to the space-time continuum.
According to Balog, the book idea started over brunch (or was it a seance? The details are fuzzy). After getting the blessing of the original members — because you don’t write a book about SLAUGHTER without asking permission unless you want a chainsaw revving in your nightmares — the authors began collecting stories, interviews, and probably restraining orders from anyone who had the misfortune of being within earshot during SLAUGHTER’s reign of terror.
And because the metal gods demand tribute, Nuclear Blast reissued “Strappado” in 2001, along with a compilation called “Not Dead Yet/Paranormal”. Presumably, the title refers to SLAUGHTER’s ability to haunt your dreams long after you’ve turned off the record player.
After SLAUGHTER disbanded (probably because even Satan was like, “Guys, maybe take a break?”), Dave Hewson tried to keep the nightmare alive with a new lineup called STRAPPADO. Spoiler alert: it didn’t go anywhere. Maybe it was the name confusion, or maybe the world just wasn’t ready for round two of sonic obliteration.
SLAUGHTER was also a key player in Toronto’s early thrash scene, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with legends like RAZOR, SACRIFICE, and EXCITER. If you ever wondered what a mosh pit in hell looks like, just imagine these four bands sharing a stage.
So, mark your calendars, kids. In a few years, you’ll be able to own “Tales From The Chainsaw”, a book so metal it probably comes with a built-in air raid siren. Until then, keep your chainsaws tuned, your riffs downtuned, and your earplugs handy. SLAUGHTER isn’t just a band — it’s a lifestyle. And possibly a noise complaint waiting to happen. 🤘⚰️
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
