DOJ To Bring Back Firing Squad As Means Of Entertainment
WASHINGTON—In an effort to provide some joy to the nation and boost overall well-being, Justice Department officials announced plans…
Author: Finn
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
Nation Longs For Good Old Days When Comedians Were Funny And Didn’t Wish Death On People
U.S. — On the heels of yet another attempted act of political violence being used for laughs by late-night…
Because the World Was Missing a Movie Where a Cowboy and a Swordsman Team Up to Fight Crime and Look Ridiculously Cool Doing It in a Battle of Wits and Facial Hair
Breaking news: Django and Zorro are teaming up, because who doesn’t love a good buddy cop movie… set in the…
JD Vance Still Waiting For Secret Service To Retrieve Him From Secure Hiding Area
The post JD Vance Still Waiting For Secret Service To Retrieve Him From Secure Hiding Area appeared first on…
Trump Presents King Charles With Autographed Copy Of Declaration Of Independence
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump welcomed King Charles III and Queen Camilla to the White House on Monday…
Struggling New York Mets To Start Mr. Met At Third Base
NEW YORK, NY — Following a brutal 9-19 start to the season, the struggling New York Mets announced that…
Report: You Probably Due To Experience Big Life Tragedy Soon
LEXINGTON, KY—Researchers at the University of Kentucky published a study Monday confirming that you should brace yourself for a…
Liberals Applaud Improving Diversity Of Would-Be Trump Assassins
U.S. — Following the harrowing incident at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner over the weekend, progressives across the United…
Architect Carefully Designs Airport So Rental Car Center Is Conveniently Located 75 Miles Away
DENVER, CO — In a groundbreaking move for municipal infrastructure, lead architect Gerald Hinkley unveiled blueprints for a renovated…
Phone, Porn Addictions Converging Nicely
The post Phone, Porn Addictions Converging Nicely appeared first on The Onion. The post Phone, Porn Addictions Converging Nicely…