Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Pilot Throws Tantrum After Forgetting Flight Attendants Exist, Hears Imaginary Cockpit Gremlins
Elephant Reads CNN

Pilot Throws Tantrum After Forgetting Flight Attendants Exist, Hears Imaginary Cockpit Gremlins

Big ElephantOctober 21, 2025October 21, 2025

Folks, can you believe this? Another airline incident! You just know some radical leftist was trying to storm the cockpit,…

From Bagpipes to Prison Bars: American Tourist’s Scottish Detour Ends in Utah Jail Cell
Elephant Reads CNN

From Bagpipes to Prison Bars: American Tourist’s Scottish Detour Ends in Utah Jail Cell

Big ElephantOctober 21, 2025October 21, 2025

Another day, another victory for justice! A Utah judge has finally thrown the book at Nicholas Rossi, a man who…

Analysis: Government Shutdown Crisis: A Comedy of Errors in Zero Acts
Elephant Reads CNN

Analysis: Government Shutdown Crisis: A Comedy of Errors in Zero Acts

Big ElephantOctober 21, 2025October 21, 2025

Oh, the horror! The radical Democrats, in cahoots with the Deep State, are at it again, trying to undermine our…

From American Dream to ‘Meh-rica’: How Trump’s Visa Drama Sent Students Running for the Border (and Other Countries)
Elephant Reads CNN

From American Dream to ‘Meh-rica’: How Trump’s Visa Drama Sent Students Running for the Border (and Other Countries)

Big ElephantOctober 21, 2025October 21, 2025

Oh, the horror! It seems that fewer Indian students are flocking to our glorious American universities, all thanks to President…

Wall Street’s Chill Pill: Why Israel and Iran Might Finally Make Them Care | CNN Business
Elephant Reads CNN

Wall Street’s Chill Pill: Why Israel and Iran Might Finally Make Them Care | CNN Business

Big ElephantOctober 21, 2025October 21, 2025

Oh, the delicate global markets are “calm” amidst the Israel-Iran spat, says CNN. Calm like a sleeping rattlesnake, folks! These…

Wall Street’s Spooky Season: More Like Spooked-y Then Gone-y
Elephant Reads CNN

Wall Street’s Spooky Season: More Like Spooked-y Then Gone-y

Big ElephantOctober 20, 2025October 20, 2025

Oh, Wall Street’s having a little boo-boo? How precious. The snowflakes on Wall Street finally got spooked by something other…

Biden Nukes Cancer with Rays, Still Kicking Strong
Elephant Reads CNN

Biden Nukes Cancer with Rays, Still Kicking Strong

Big ElephantOctober 20, 2025October 20, 2025

Old Joe’s Still Kicking…Probably Just to Further the Socialist Agenda! The failing CNN reports that Prostate Joe, I mean, Biden,…

OMG, They’re Attacking James Comey’s BFF Lawyer?! CNN Freaks Out
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG, They’re Attacking James Comey’s BFF Lawyer?! CNN Freaks Out

Big ElephantOctober 20, 2025October 20, 2025

Looks like the Deep State’s swamp creatures are at it again! The Justice Department, probably infiltrated by more disgruntled liberals,…

Kada Scott Update: Officials Finally Found Her (Behind a School, No Less)
Elephant Reads CNN

Kada Scott Update: Officials Finally Found Her (Behind a School, No Less)

Big ElephantOctober 20, 2025October 20, 2025

Another day, another tragedy in a Democrat-run city! Philadelphia, folks, where Soros-backed D.A. Larry Krasner is too busy “upholding the…

Trump frees ‘narco-terrorists’ – Is this a new reality show pitch
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump frees ‘narco-terrorists’ – Is this a new reality show pitch

Big ElephantOctober 20, 2025October 20, 2025

Another day, another Deep State conspiracy foiled by our glorious President Trump! CNN, still whining about Trump’s efforts to secure…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 189 190 191 … 330 Next

Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Confirm Todd Blanche Without Delay Experts Urge Republicans
  • Michigan Senate Debate Devolves Into Playground Insults
  • Roger Waters Teams With Palestinian Singer For Comfortably Numb Remake
  • Dolly Parton Loses Brother Coy Denver Parton At 82
  • McConnell Told To Spill The Beans Or Step Down Already

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}