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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Guy Asks Question, Instantly Becomes Conspiracy Theorists’ New Punching Bag
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Guy Asks Question, Instantly Becomes Conspiracy Theorists’ New Punching Bag

Big ElephantSeptember 8, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Hunter Kozak, a student at Utah Valley University, witnessed the assassination…

China Ditches Iran For Brazil Oil Because Why Not
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

China Ditches Iran For Brazil Oil Because Why Not

Big ElephantSeptember 8, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Brazil’s oil production hitting record highs, and I just can’t help but…

Family’s Vacation Takes Unexpected Detour Over Ocean Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Family’s Vacation Takes Unexpected Detour Over Ocean Apparently

Big ElephantSeptember 8, 2026

I’m sitting here sipping my coffee and reading about a family in South Florida who’s going through a nightmare. A…

US Seeks Smaller Middle East Footprint Because That Worked So Well
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US Seeks Smaller Middle East Footprint Because That Worked So Well

Big ElephantSeptember 8, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest developments in the Middle East, and folks, it’s a real mess.…

Hunter Biden Spins Infamous Laptop Into Crypto Gold
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Hunter Biden Spins Infamous Laptop Into Crypto Gold

Big ElephantSeptember 7, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Hunter Biden, the son of former President Joe Biden, is launching…

Newsom Tests Presidential Waters In South Carolina
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Newsom Tests Presidential Waters In South Carolina

Big ElephantSeptember 7, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. California Governor Gavin Newsom is making waves in South Carolina, and…

Amazon Plane Takes Detour Into Cemetery
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Amazon Plane Takes Detour Into Cemetery

Big ElephantSeptember 7, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A Boeing 767-300, operated by 21 Air and bearing Amazon’s “Smile”…

War With Iran Somehow Made Economy Worse
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

War With Iran Somehow Made Economy Worse

Big ElephantSeptember 7, 2026

The Iran war has certainly left its mark on the global economy, and I’m not just talking about the price…

Volkswagen Trades Cars for Cannons in Israel Deal
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Volkswagen Trades Cars for Cannons in Israel Deal

Big ElephantSeptember 7, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Volkswagen is converting a car plant in northwestern Germany to defense…

Babysitter’s Repeat Performance Ends in Kidnapping Again Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Babysitter’s Repeat Performance Ends in Kidnapping Again Apparently

Big ElephantSeptember 7, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee, reading through this wild story, and I just can’t believe what I’m seeing. Elica Redding, a…

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