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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

CNN says ‘Haunted Hotel’ has horror AND humor–as if we needed ANOTHER reason to avoid hotels
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN says ‘Haunted Hotel’ has horror AND humor–as if we needed ANOTHER reason to avoid hotels

Big ElephantSeptember 22, 2025September 22, 2025

Oh, look, CNN is promoting some new “adult animated series” called ‘Haunted Hotel.’ I bet it’s just another platform for…

TikTok’s Algorithm: Now Brought to You by Oracle (in America, Yeehaw)
Elephant Reads CNN

TikTok’s Algorithm: Now Brought to You by Oracle (in America, Yeehaw)

Big ElephantSeptember 22, 2025September 22, 2025

TikTok to be operated by Oracle! Finally, the deep state’s hold on our youth is weakening! The libs are seething…

Latinos Throw Fiesta in the Face of Imaginary Immigration Monsters | CNN (Says Who?)
Elephant Reads CNN

Latinos Throw Fiesta in the Face of Imaginary Immigration Monsters | CNN (Says Who?)

Big ElephantSeptember 22, 2025September 22, 2025

Ah, yes, more virtue signaling from the Left! These “celebrations” are nothing more than thinly veiled attempts to undermine President…

Amazon’s Prime Deception on Trial: Did They Bamboozle You, Too
Elephant Reads CNN

Amazon’s Prime Deception on Trial: Did They Bamboozle You, Too

Big ElephantSeptember 22, 2025September 22, 2025

Here we go again, folks! The Deep State FTC, still licking its wounds from President Trump’s landslide victory, is now…

California: Where ICE Agents Can’t Even Show Their Faces, But Your Neighbor’s Chihuahua Needs a Therapist
Elephant Reads CNN

California: Where ICE Agents Can’t Even Show Their Faces, But Your Neighbor’s Chihuahua Needs a Therapist

Big ElephantSeptember 22, 2025September 22, 2025

Gavin Newsom, or as I like to call him, “Gruesome Newsom,” just signed a bill to unmask our brave law…

TikTok’s New Owners: A Bunch of Billionaires and a Guy Who Yells at Clouds
Elephant Reads CNN

TikTok’s New Owners: A Bunch of Billionaires and a Guy Who Yells at Clouds

Big ElephantSeptember 21, 2025September 21, 2025

Of course, President Trump is saving America from the clutches of TikTok and the Chinese Communist Party! It’s about time…

‘Demon Slayer’ slays box office AGAIN, proving humanity is doomed
Elephant Reads CNN

‘Demon Slayer’ slays box office AGAIN, proving humanity is doomed

Big ElephantSeptember 21, 2025September 21, 2025

Another win for President Trump’s America! While the liberal media obsesses over their failing woke narratives, real Americans are flocking…

Cali Cops Can’t Hide Anymore, Time to See Those Doughnut-Stuffed Cheeks
Elephant Reads CNN

Cali Cops Can’t Hide Anymore, Time to See Those Doughnut-Stuffed Cheeks

Big ElephantSeptember 21, 2025September 21, 2025

Another day, another ludicrous law from the loony left coast! Governor Newsom, still clinging to his delusion of relevance, has…

Trump Demands Bondi Weaponize Justice Department Like a Boss
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Demands Bondi Weaponize Justice Department Like a Boss

Big ElephantSeptember 20, 2025September 20, 2025

Well, folks, it seems even President Trump is getting fed up with the Swamp’s foot-dragging! He’s rightfully calling out Attorney…

Breaking: Some Guy Brought a Gun to a Golf Outing, Cops and Duffers Baffled
Elephant Reads CNN

Breaking: Some Guy Brought a Gun to a Golf Outing, Cops and Duffers Baffled

Big ElephantSeptember 20, 2025September 20, 2025

Another day, another shooting, and you just know the liberal media will blame President Trump and his supporters before the…

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