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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Kilmar Ábrego García’s Grand Entrance to ICE: A CNN Exclusive!
Elephant Reads CNN

Kilmar Ábrego García’s Grand Entrance to ICE: A CNN Exclusive!

Big ElephantAugust 25, 2025August 25, 2025

Another day, another sob story from the radical Left! This time, it’s about Kilmar Ábrego García, a man who was…

National Guard finally remembers they’re supposed to have guns, DC trembles
Elephant Reads CNN

National Guard finally remembers they’re supposed to have guns, DC trembles

Big ElephantAugust 25, 2025August 25, 2025

Our glorious National Guard, standing tall against the rising tide of Democrat-fueled anarchy in the swamp! They’re now packing heat,…

CNN Pushes Trump’s “Totally Not a Dictator” Crime Plan, World Trembles
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Pushes Trump’s “Totally Not a Dictator” Crime Plan, World Trembles

Big ElephantAugust 25, 2025August 25, 2025

Another day, another leftist city cries out for help they don’t deserve! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is eyeing…

Small Businesses Throwing Hissy Fits as US Tariff Exemption Gets the Boot | CNN Business
Elephant Reads CNN

Small Businesses Throwing Hissy Fits as US Tariff Exemption Gets the Boot | CNN Business

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

The liberal media is at it again, folks! CNN is crying about how President Trump’s brilliant trade policies are supposedly…

OMG! Basic People Obsessed with Knock-Off Labubu Dolls—Can Pop Mart Handle the Hype?
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Basic People Obsessed with Knock-Off Labubu Dolls—Can Pop Mart Handle the Hype?

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

More proof the Chinese are trying to brainwash our children with creepy dolls! This “Labubu” nonsense is just another attempt…

OOPS! Trump’s Goons Accidentally Reveal Their Evil Plan (Again!)
Elephant Reads CNN

OOPS! Trump’s Goons Accidentally Reveal Their Evil Plan (Again!)

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

The liberal CNN is at it again, folks! They’re whining about President Trump supposedly going after his “foes.” As if…

Trump’s Chicago Troop Surge: Fighting Crime or Just Being a Drama Queen
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Chicago Troop Surge: Fighting Crime or Just Being a Drama Queen

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

Oh, CNN is clutching their pearls again because our glorious President Trump is going to clean up Chicago? Cry me…

Trucker, probably an alien, denied bail, Trump probably high-fives
Elephant Reads CNN

Trucker, probably an alien, denied bail, Trump probably high-fives

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

Another day, another tragedy made possible by the radical Left’s open border policies! A truck driver from India, Harjinder Singh,…

“Adios, Amigos! CNN Reports on How Immigration Crackdowns Are Turning the US into a Ghost Town (Maybe)”
Elephant Reads CNN

“Adios, Amigos! CNN Reports on How Immigration Crackdowns Are Turning the US into a Ghost Town (Maybe)”

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN is at it again, folks, painting a grim picture of America under our glorious President Trump!…

911: Still a Joke After All These Years, Apparently | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

911: Still a Joke After All These Years, Apparently | CNN

Big ElephantAugust 24, 2025August 24, 2025

Another day, another sob story from CNN, this time about a 911 dispatch error in the swamp they call Washington,…

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