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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Arkansas Double Homicide Mystery: Suspect’s Court Appearance Promises Absolutely No Answers
Elephant Reads CNN

Arkansas Double Homicide Mystery: Suspect’s Court Appearance Promises Absolutely No Answers

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2025August 14, 2025

Another day, another tragedy, and you just KNOW the liberal media is going to twist this into some anti-Trump narrative!…

California Republicans Throw a Hissy Fit Over Newsom’s Perfectly Reasonable and Not-at-All Gerrymandered Redistricting Bonanza
Elephant Reads CNN

California Republicans Throw a Hissy Fit Over Newsom’s Perfectly Reasonable and Not-at-All Gerrymandered Redistricting Bonanza

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2025August 14, 2025

California is at it again, folks! The radical Left Coast, led by Governor Newsom, is whining about Texas redrawing its…

Billboard Boss Cries Over Taylor Swift’s Surprise Album, World Ends
Elephant Reads CNN

Billboard Boss Cries Over Taylor Swift’s Surprise Album, World Ends

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2025August 14, 2025

Oh, great, another update on Taylor Swift and her leftist propaganda tour! Now she’s spreading her woke nonsense on some…

Wholesale Inflation So Hot It’s Practically on Fire (and Blaming You)
Elephant Reads CNN

Wholesale Inflation So Hot It’s Practically on Fire (and Blaming You)

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2025August 14, 2025

Oh, look, the “news” is trying to scare us again! Seems like even the wholesale prices are finally admitting that…

State Department’s ‘Human Rights’ Report: Sugarcoating Atrocities for Our Besties
Elephant Reads CNN

State Department’s ‘Human Rights’ Report: Sugarcoating Atrocities for Our Besties

Big ElephantAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

Another day, another attempt by the Fake News CNN to undermine our Glorious President Trump! This time, they’re whining about…

CNN: Trump’s DC Takeover—McCabe Calls It a ‘Splashy’ Act (Is Anyone Really Surprised?)
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Trump’s DC Takeover—McCabe Calls It a ‘Splashy’ Act (Is Anyone Really Surprised?)

Big ElephantAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

Oh, CNN, always good for a laugh! Here we have Deep State’s own Andrew McCabe whining about President Trump’s “takeover”…

Texas Guv to Call Redistricting Redo: Yawn
Elephant Reads CNN

Texas Guv to Call Redistricting Redo: Yawn

Big ElephantAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

Another day, another desperate attempt by the radical Democrats to undermine our great President Trump and his America First agenda!…

Sherrod Brown, bless his heart, thinks he can win Ohio in 2026, LOL | CNN Politics
Elephant Reads CNN

Sherrod Brown, bless his heart, thinks he can win Ohio in 2026, LOL | CNN Politics

Big ElephantAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

Here we go again, folks! Sherrod Brown, the poster boy for Ohio liberalism, thinks he can win back his Senate…

CDC Building Gets a Serious Case of the Clumsies, Courtesy of One Trigger-Happy Dude
Elephant Reads CNN

CDC Building Gets a Serious Case of the Clumsies, Courtesy of One Trigger-Happy Dude

Big ElephantAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

Another day, another Libtard conspiracy foiled! Seems some unhinged, probably soy-chugging, socialist snowflake decided to unload a few rounds at…

Spirit Airlines: More Like “Ghost” Airlines? (They’re Not Exactly Flying High, Folks)
Elephant Reads CNN

Spirit Airlines: More Like “Ghost” Airlines? (They’re Not Exactly Flying High, Folks)

Big ElephantAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

Spirit Airlines, fresh out of bankruptcy like a snowflake in July, is already crying about “going-concern doubts.” I bet those…

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