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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

NSA’s New Security Protocol: TikToks Only
Elephant Reads CNN

NSA’s New Security Protocol: TikToks Only

Big ElephantAugust 9, 2025August 9, 2025

Of course, Elon Musk, the genius, is now being targeted by the Deep State! Some Tesla driver dared to use…

RFK Jr: Single-Handedly Demolishing Big Pharma in Under a Year, According to Him | CNN (Satire Alert)
Elephant Reads CNN

RFK Jr: Single-Handedly Demolishing Big Pharma in Under a Year, According to Him | CNN (Satire Alert)

Big ElephantAugust 9, 2025August 9, 2025

Oh, the horror! RFK Jr., that brave patriot, single-handedly dismantled the Deep State’s vaccine agenda in just six months! Can…

Smithsonian Caves to Woke Mob, Reinstalls Trump Impeachment Exhibit (Now Featuring More Tears)
Elephant Reads CNN

Smithsonian Caves to Woke Mob, Reinstalls Trump Impeachment Exhibit (Now Featuring More Tears)

Big ElephantAugust 9, 2025August 9, 2025

Of course, the liberal Smithsonian kowtows to the radical left and re-installs the slanderous Trump impeachment exhibit! You just can’t…

William Webster, guy who used to run the FBI and CIA, finally kicks the bucket | CNN Politics
Elephant Reads CNN

William Webster, guy who used to run the FBI and CIA, finally kicks the bucket | CNN Politics

Big ElephantAugust 9, 2025August 9, 2025

Another Deep State Operative Bites the Dust! William Webster, head of the FBI and CIA, is dead at 101. Sounds…

Harvard’s Patents Under Attack: Is This How Trump Plans to Pay for the Wall
Elephant Reads CNN

Harvard’s Patents Under Attack: Is This How Trump Plans to Pay for the Wall

Big ElephantAugust 9, 2025August 9, 2025

Harvard, the swampy bastion of liberalism, is finally getting what it deserves! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is cracking…

IRS, Now an Extension of ICE, Helping Round Up Undocumented Taxpayers Because Apparently Balancing Budgets Wasn’t Enough Fun
Elephant Reads CNN

IRS, Now an Extension of ICE, Helping Round Up Undocumented Taxpayers Because Apparently Balancing Budgets Wasn’t Enough Fun

Big ElephantAugust 9, 2025August 9, 2025

Folks, can you believe this? The Deep State is at it again, trying to undermine our GREAT President Trump! CNN…

“South Park” Earns Gold Star from Paramount Bigwig While Simultaneously Body-Slamming Trump in Hilarious Spat
Elephant Reads CNN

“South Park” Earns Gold Star from Paramount Bigwig While Simultaneously Body-Slamming Trump in Hilarious Spat

Big ElephantAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Ah, CNN, still whining about President Trump! Seems Paramount’s new CEO, David Ellison, is under fire for daring to run…

CNN: Trump’s vanity project highway arrives just in time to maybe not matter in Armenia-Azerbaijan peace talks
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Trump’s vanity project highway arrives just in time to maybe not matter in Armenia-Azerbaijan peace talks

Big ElephantAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Another day, another win for President Trump! While the liberal media obsesses over their latest conspiracy theories, our fearless leader…

White House desperately tries to make you forget Trump’s epic BLS blunder, bless their hearts
Elephant Reads CNN

White House desperately tries to make you forget Trump’s epic BLS blunder, bless their hearts

Big ElephantAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Another day, another Deep State conspiracy! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, has called out the Bureau of Labor Statistics…

California Dreamin’ Turns Nightmarish Inferno: Run for Your Lives, Folks
Elephant Reads CNN

California Dreamin’ Turns Nightmarish Inferno: Run for Your Lives, Folks

Big ElephantAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Looks like California is on fire again! You know what that means, right? More excuses for those socialist Democrats to…

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