US Postal Service begging Congress for cash before mailman becomes a ghost rider
Postal Service on Brink of Collapse, Begging for Taxpayer Bailout Well, folks, it’s official – the government’s version of Amazon…
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US demoted to “semi-democratic” status as press freedom fears loom | CNN Business
Another Day, Another Soros-Funded Hit Piece on President Trump Sweden’s V-Dem Institute, a left-wing propaganda outfit bankrolled by George Soros…
Iran Update: Current Tax Dollars Winning Battle Against Tax Dollars From Three Years Ago
TEHRAN — After three weeks of fighting in Iran, current U.S. tax dollars are steadily defeating U.S. tax dollars…
Job Applicant Informed Role Of Pig Boy Has Been Filled
MILWAUKEE—Dashing his hopes of taking on the new opportunity, local job applicant Mark McCarthy was reportedly informed by email…
Mom Frustrated As Kids Once Again Devour Groceries Before Getting Home From Store
LINCOLN, NE — Local mom Clara Gibbons expressed dismay upon discovering that her children had once again eaten all…
‘Dune’ Returns With First ‘Part 3’ Trailer—Because Clearly We Didn’t Get Enough Sand in Our Eyes Yet
Well, well, well, look who’s back for round three! 🍿 Denis Villeneuve, the man who apparently has a lot of…
3,800 Workers Strike At Massive Meatpacking Plant
About 3,800 workers at one of the nation’s largest meatpacking plants began striking in Colorado, the first walkout at…
Spirit Unveils New All-Duct Tape Aircraft
DANIA BEACH, FL — Spirit Airlines unveiled a new all-duct tape aircraft that is expected to increase the company’s…
Man Condemned To Hell For Texting ‘LOL’ When He Didn’t Really Laugh Out Loud
HADES — Demons happily welcomed 27-year-old Jim Carole to Hell on Tuesday after he was immediately condemned to eternal…
Live Action Short Film Winner Celebrates By Taking Oscar To In-N-Out Shift
LOS ANGELES—Claiming it was the only place he wanted to go after receiving one of Hollywood’s highest honors, Academy…