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Category: Babylon Bee

RFK Starts Off Cooking Show With Reminder To Always Cook Raccoon To At Least 165 Degrees
Babylon Bee

RFK Starts Off Cooking Show With Reminder To Always Cook Raccoon To At Least 165 Degrees

FinnAugust 4, 2026

    HUNTINGTON BEACH, CA — Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. kicked off his new cooking show…

Trump Warns Iran This Is Their Fourth-To-Last Chance At Peace
Babylon Bee

Trump Warns Iran This Is Their Fourth-To-Last Chance At Peace

FinnAugust 4, 2026

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — The stakes in the war with Iran reached new heights this morning, as President Donald Trump…

Dodgers Acquire Kal-El Of Krypton
Babylon Bee

Dodgers Acquire Kal-El Of Krypton

FinnAugust 3, 2026

    LOS ANGELES, CA — In a stunning move to further bolster an already imposing starting lineup, the Los Angeles…

James Talarico Tells Us His 9 Favorite Bible Verses
Babylon Bee

James Talarico Tells Us His 9 Favorite Bible Verses

FinnAugust 3, 2026

    You may think you know the Bible, but boy does Texas Senate candidate James Talarico have news for you.…

WNBA Coaches Stumped As To What The ‘W’ Stands For
Babylon Bee

WNBA Coaches Stumped As To What The ‘W’ Stands For

FinnAugust 3, 2026

    INDIANAPOLIS, IN — Coaches across the WNBA spoke to members of the press this week and admitted that they…

Democrats Express Concern Over Increase In Gun Violence Against Active Shooters
Babylon Bee

Democrats Express Concern Over Increase In Gun Violence Against Active Shooters

FinnAugust 3, 2026

    U.S. — Democratic leaders expressed deep concern about the growing scourge of gun violence against active shooters.    Read More…

Man Checks Which Propositions The Teachers Union Supports So He Knows What To Vote Against
Babylon Bee

Man Checks Which Propositions The Teachers Union Supports So He Knows What To Vote Against

FinnAugust 3, 2026

    PORTLAND, OR — Local man Dave McMillan devised a foolproof way to determine which propositions he should support on…

Spain Proudly Announces That Ceuta Is The Fastest-Growing City In The World
Babylon Bee

Spain Proudly Announces That Ceuta Is The Fastest-Growing City In The World

FinnAugust 3, 2026

    MADRID — The Spanish government proudly announced that after a recent demographic change, the city of Ceuta is now…

‘Only Elite Assassins Can Do This,’ Says Candace Owens Of 6-Month-Old Crawling Across Kitchen Floor
Babylon Bee

‘Only Elite Assassins Can Do This,’ Says Candace Owens Of 6-Month-Old Crawling Across Kitchen Floor

FinnAugust 1, 2026

    NASHVILLE, TN — Podcast host Candace Owens explained to listeners that only the most highly-trained commandos could execute the…

Catastrophe As Man Fails To Listen Closely Even Though Menu Options Have Changed
Babylon Bee

Catastrophe As Man Fails To Listen Closely Even Though Menu Options Have Changed

FinnJuly 31, 2026

    PEORIA, IL — Authorities advised all residents to be on high alert heading into the weekend, following a sudden…

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