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Category: Babylon Bee

So-Called Christian Nationalist Hasn’t Even Posted Anything Overtly Hateful Online Yet Today
Babylon Bee

So-Called Christian Nationalist Hasn’t Even Posted Anything Overtly Hateful Online Yet Today

FinnJuly 27, 2026

    BOISE, ID — The credentials of one local man were called into question, as the so-called Christian Nationalist had…

Hollywood Holds Hearings To Root Out Suspected Non-Communists
Babylon Bee

Hollywood Holds Hearings To Root Out Suspected Non-Communists

FinnJuly 27, 2026

    LOS ANGELES, CA — At the request of Hollywood executives, the California state government opened an inquiry into possible…

Japanese Tourist Shamed For Returning Home With Only Five Hundred Million Photos Of Vacation
Babylon Bee

Japanese Tourist Shamed For Returning Home With Only Five Hundred Million Photos Of Vacation

FinnJuly 27, 2026

    FLORENCE — Japanese tourist Keiko Haruto was instantly shamed by her friends and family after it was discovered that…

Fauci Starting To Think That Maybe Keeping A Daily Perjury Diary Was A Bad Idea
Babylon Bee

Fauci Starting To Think That Maybe Keeping A Daily Perjury Diary Was A Bad Idea

FinnJuly 27, 2026

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — Former Chief Medical Advisor Dr. Anthony Fauci admitted to those close to him that he was…

Aw, Nice: Someone Just Shouted ‘God Is The Greatest!’ In Arabic, So Something Really Good Must Be Happening
Babylon Bee

Aw, Nice: Someone Just Shouted ‘God Is The Greatest!’ In Arabic, So Something Really Good Must Be Happening

FinnJuly 27, 2026

    WORLD — Across the globe this past weekend, dozens of people had the great fortune to hear someone shouting…

Elon Musk Acquires Total Ownership Of The Economist
Babylon Bee

Elon Musk Acquires Total Ownership Of The Economist

FinnJuly 25, 2026

    AUSTIN, TX — Over the course of a ninety-minute transaction, Elon Musk became the sole and absolute owner of…

LeBron James: ‘I’m Taking My Receding Hairline to Philly’
Babylon Bee

LeBron James: ‘I’m Taking My Receding Hairline to Philly’

FinnJuly 25, 2026

    LOS ANGELES, CA — LeBron James has made the final free agency decision of his career, announcing that he…

Wells Fargo Explains That Yes, They Gave All Your Money To A Hobo Named Frank, But Will Make Things Right By Coming To Your House To Murder You
Babylon Bee

Wells Fargo Explains That Yes, They Gave All Your Money To A Hobo Named Frank, But Will Make Things Right By Coming To Your House To Murder You

FinnJuly 25, 2026

    HOUSTON, TX — Representatives for Wells Fargo explained to local customer Jim Stephens that they did give all of…

CVS Clerk Reminds Looter To Enter Rewards Number Before Fleeing
Babylon Bee

CVS Clerk Reminds Looter To Enter Rewards Number Before Fleeing

FinnJuly 24, 2026

    SANTA MONICA, CA — According to sources, a CVS employee kept a clear head amid the chaos of a…

Heaven Confirms Prayer Hands Emoji Counts As Actually Praying For Someone
Babylon Bee

Heaven Confirms Prayer Hands Emoji Counts As Actually Praying For Someone

FinnJuly 24, 2026

    HEAVEN — Millions breathed a sigh of relief today as Heavenly sources confirmed that sending a prayer hands emoji…

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