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Category: Babylon Bee

Babylon Bee

Live-Action ‘Moana’ Remake Saves Money By Getting The Rock $8 Wig From Spirit Halloween

FinnMarch 24, 2026

    BURBANK, CA — Due to some clever thinking by producers of Walt Disney Pictures’ live-action Moana remake, the $150…

Babylon Bee

Terrorists Give Up After Three Hours In TSA Line

FinnMarch 24, 2026

    NEW YORK, NY — A terrorist became frustrated and decided the attack he had been planning wasn’t worth the…

Babylon Bee

CNN Calls War For Iran

FinnMarch 23, 2026

    U.S. — CNN announced a shift in its reporting of the US-Israel war with Iran on Monday, declaring the…

Babylon Bee

Considerate Video Game Boss Leaves Plenty Of Health And Ammo In Room Right Before You Fight Him

FinnMarch 23, 2026

    RACCOON CITY — Maintaining some semblance of his humanity, a grotesque boss monster located in an underground laboratory helpfully…

Babylon Bee

Trump Releases Line Of Sympathy Cards

FinnMarch 23, 2026

    U.S. — Separate from his work as the nation’s commander in chief, President Donald Trump announced that he was…

Babylon Bee

Statue Of Cesar Chavez Gropes Woman As It’s Being Taken Down

FinnMarch 23, 2026

    SAN FERNANDO, CA — An existing scandal was made even worse over the weekend, as a statue of the…

Babylon Bee

Paddleboat Ride Enjoyable For Seven Seconds

FinnMarch 23, 2026

    STANLEY, ID — A paddleboat ride at a local lake resulted in about seven seconds of enjoyment for a…

Babylon Bee

Trump Postpones Iran Strikes Until They All Assemble In One Place Again For A Meeting

FinnMarch 23, 2026

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a promising sign that the weeks-long conflict in the Middle East could soon be over,…

Babylon Bee

After Jesus Bestows Nicknames ‘The Rock’ And ‘Sons Of Thunder’, Apostle James Bummed To Get Stuck With ‘The Lesser’

FinnMarch 22, 2026

    JUDEA — With his fellow apostle scoring nicknames from Jesus like “The Rock” and “Sons of Thunder”, the Apostle…

Babylon Bee

Saint Peter Gently Asks Chuck Norris To Stop Roundhouse Kicking The Cherubim

FinnMarch 21, 2026

    HEAVEN — After several incidents over the course of his first day in paradise, Chuck Norris was pulled aside…

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