Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Elephant Reads CNN

No Kings 2: Electric Boogaloo! CNN Serves Up Another Helping of Weekend Wah-Wah
Elephant Reads CNN

No Kings 2: Electric Boogaloo! CNN Serves Up Another Helping of Weekend Wah-Wah

Big ElephantOctober 17, 2025October 17, 2025

Here we go again, folks! The liberal snowflakes are planning another round of their “No Kings” protests because, apparently, they…

Dow Plummets 400 Points Because Apparently Banks Still Exist
Elephant Reads CNN

Dow Plummets 400 Points Because Apparently Banks Still Exist

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Oh no, the stock market had a boo-boo! Must be the Democrats and their socialist agenda trying to undermine President…

Judge Demands DOJ Give Back Chicago’s Toys After Border Patrol Shooting Car Crash Kerfuffle
Elephant Reads CNN

Judge Demands DOJ Give Back Chicago’s Toys After Border Patrol Shooting Car Crash Kerfuffle

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Another day, another Soros-funded “protest” gone wrong! This Marimar Martinez, probably a card-carrying member of the DSA, claims she was…

Dem Rep Hilariously Suggests GOP Should Consult MTG on Shutdown Crisis, World Holds Breath
Elephant Reads CNN

Dem Rep Hilariously Suggests GOP Should Consult MTG on Shutdown Crisis, World Holds Breath

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Another day, another Democrat trying to appease the radical left! Ro Khanna wants Republicans to listen to Marjorie Taylor Greene?…

Tapper Clowns Johnson for AOC’s Epic Shutdown Dragging Session: A CNN Political Circus
Elephant Reads CNN

Tapper Clowns Johnson for AOC’s Epic Shutdown Dragging Session: A CNN Political Circus

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Another day, another desperate attempt by Fake News CNN to prop up the failing Left! Crooked Jake Tapper, still whining…

GOP Rep. Giménez Channels Inner Yoda, Declares ‘Nobody Above Law, Hmm?’
Elephant Reads CNN

GOP Rep. Giménez Channels Inner Yoda, Declares ‘Nobody Above Law, Hmm?’

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Another day, another deep-state drama! This time, CNN is hyperventilating because someone, somewhere, is thinking about maybe indicting John Bolton.…

Chicago Cop Gets the Boot (and Deported?!) by ICE!
Elephant Reads CNN

Chicago Cop Gets the Boot (and Deported?!) by ICE!

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Another day, another illegal alien getting caught thanks to President Trump’s commitment to MAGA! This time, it’s a police officer…

Trump and Putin to buddy-buddy in Budapest, Ukraine War? More Like Bore-kraine War
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump and Putin to buddy-buddy in Budapest, Ukraine War? More Like Bore-kraine War

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Our Glorious President Trump, in his infinite wisdom and unmatched deal-making prowess, is STILL working to end the ridiculous war…

Gulf States Go Full Pharaoh Fanboy on Egypt’s Beachfront Property
Elephant Reads CNN

Gulf States Go Full Pharaoh Fanboy on Egypt’s Beachfront Property

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Another day, another socialist scheme! CNN is trying to make you believe that Egypt’s North Coast development is just some…

OMG! Dem Moneybags vs Poor Lil’ Republicans: Senate Race Edition
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Dem Moneybags vs Poor Lil’ Republicans: Senate Race Edition

Big ElephantOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

Oh, the horror! The radical socialist Democrats are raking in the dough, probably from George Soros and the Chinese Communist…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 139 140 141 … 277 Next

Latest posts

  • ISIS Claims Responsibility For Reflecting Pool Algae
  • Obama Library Cruelly Disenfranchises Millions Of Black Americans By Requiring Photo ID For Entry
  • Cringe: Out-Of-Touch Company Posts Pride Logo Like It’s 2014 Or Something
  • Liberal snowflakes freak out over Trump’s impending election domination wins
  • Liberal actor whines about Juneteenth being supposedly erased by Trump

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}