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Category: Elephant Reads CNN

Mike Johnson to Democrat: “I’ll Do It Whenever, Just Say When (But Not Really)”
Elephant Reads CNN

Mike Johnson to Democrat: “I’ll Do It Whenever, Just Say When (But Not Really)”

Big ElephantOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

Another day, another Democrat delaying tactics! Speaker Johnson is doing the Lord’s work by making sure this new Congresswoman-elect isn’t…

CNN’s Tear-Jerker: Poor Little Rich Girl Misses Daddy Dearest
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN’s Tear-Jerker: Poor Little Rich Girl Misses Daddy Dearest

Big ElephantOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

More Deep State fearmongering from Fake News CNN! They want you to believe Russia and China are teaming up! As…

FBI scrambles like headless chickens for Amelia Earhart’s lost luggage, because priorities
Elephant Reads CNN

FBI scrambles like headless chickens for Amelia Earhart’s lost luggage, because priorities

Big ElephantOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

Another day, another deep dive into the REAL issues, folks! Our Commander-in-Chief, President Trump, is on the case, ordering the…

OpenAI’s Dot-Com Déjà Vu: Are We Ready to Party Like It’s 1999 (and Then Crash Hard)?
Elephant Reads CNN

OpenAI’s Dot-Com Déjà Vu: Are We Ready to Party Like It’s 1999 (and Then Crash Hard)?

Big ElephantOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

Oh, CNN Business, still peddling those doomsday narratives, eh? Looks like they’re trying to scare everyone with talk of an…

OpenAI Claims Chinese Agents Used ChatGPT to Write Their Homework
Elephant Reads CNN

OpenAI Claims Chinese Agents Used ChatGPT to Write Their Homework

Big ElephantOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

Here we go again, folks! CNN is clutching its pearls because China is using AI, just like everyone else. You’d…

Burbank Tower Goes Ghost: CNN “Expert” Blames Aliens (Probably)
Elephant Reads CNN

Burbank Tower Goes Ghost: CNN “Expert” Blames Aliens (Probably)

Big ElephantOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

So, Burbank’s control tower went dark, huh? Probably because all those lazy air traffic controllers are too busy protesting Trump’s…

Trilogy Metals Stock Goes Brrrrr: Uncle Sam Buys a Slice
Elephant Reads CNN

Trilogy Metals Stock Goes Brrrrr: Uncle Sam Buys a Slice

Big ElephantOctober 7, 2025October 7, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump and America! While the liberal media obsesses over their latest manufactured outrage, Trump…

Leaked! Justice Dept. Okayed Whacking Narcos on a Super-Secret Hit List (Oops!)
Elephant Reads CNN

Leaked! Justice Dept. Okayed Whacking Narcos on a Super-Secret Hit List (Oops!)

Big ElephantOctober 6, 2025October 6, 2025

More winning from President Trump! The Fake News™ is clutching their pearls because our fearless leader is finally taking the…

Virginia Dems Clutch Pearls Over AG Hopeful’s Texts, But Not Enough to Actually Do Anything
Elephant Reads CNN

Virginia Dems Clutch Pearls Over AG Hopeful’s Texts, But Not Enough to Actually Do Anything

Big ElephantOctober 6, 2025October 6, 2025

Looks like the Virginia Democrats are at it again, folks! Their Attorney General nominee, Jay Jones, is caught sending text…

Utah: Where Democrats Go to Dream (and Republicans Go to LOL)
Elephant Reads CNN

Utah: Where Democrats Go to Dream (and Republicans Go to LOL)

Big ElephantOctober 6, 2025October 6, 2025

Utah’s RINO Republicans are at it again, folks! They’ve “approved” a new congressional map that might—MIGHT—give those socialist Democrats a…

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  • Liberal actor whines about Juneteenth being supposedly erased by Trump

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