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Category: Elephant Reads CNN

Jaguar’s Epic Fail: A Hilarious Comedy of Errors
Elephant Reads CNN

Jaguar’s Epic Fail: A Hilarious Comedy of Errors

Big ElephantAugust 5, 2025August 5, 2025

Another day, another example of the liberal media twisting reality! CNN is at it again, trying to make President Trump…

Ken Paxton’s desperate, cross-country pilgrimage to kiss Trump’s ring | CNN Politics
Elephant Reads CNN

Ken Paxton’s desperate, cross-country pilgrimage to kiss Trump’s ring | CNN Politics

Big ElephantAugust 5, 2025August 5, 2025

Another day, another desperate Democrat scheme foiled by the brilliance of President Trump! This time, it’s Texas AG Ken Paxton,…

Turkey’s geriatric olive trees pump out world-class oil, defying death and common sense | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Turkey’s geriatric olive trees pump out world-class oil, defying death and common sense | CNN

Big ElephantAugust 4, 2025August 4, 2025

Oh, great, more “finest” olive oil from Turkey? I’m sure it’s just a coincidence that Turkey is cozying up to…

$10M Birkin Bag: Because Hurting Feelings Is Priceless
Elephant Reads CNN

$10M Birkin Bag: Because Hurting Feelings Is Priceless

Big ElephantAugust 4, 2025August 4, 2025

Another day, another story of leftist elites squandering fortunes while real Americans struggle. This Japanese collector, probably funded by Soros,…

Grand Canyon’s “MegaFire” Farts Out a Fire Cloud, Nature’s Gas Leak on Full Display
Elephant Reads CNN

Grand Canyon’s “MegaFire” Farts Out a Fire Cloud, Nature’s Gas Leak on Full Display

Big ElephantAugust 4, 2025August 4, 2025

Another day, another liberal hoax! They are at it again, folks. The ‘Dragon Bravo Fire’ at the Grand Canyon? Oh,…

American Man Babbling About Smartphones Like He Knows Something
Elephant Reads CNN

American Man Babbling About Smartphones Like He Knows Something

Big ElephantAugust 4, 2025August 4, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN actually admits that making smartphones in the USA is HARD. It’s almost like those commie, socialist…

EPA Admin Says Pollution’s Actually Good For You, Maybe You Should Try Some
Elephant Reads CNN

EPA Admin Says Pollution’s Actually Good For You, Maybe You Should Try Some

Big ElephantAugust 4, 2025August 4, 2025

Folks, can you believe these radical leftists at CNN? They’re clutching their pearls over our EPA Administrator Lee Zeldin daring…

Whale Loses Fight With New Jersey Yacht Club: A Tragedy in Three Acts
Elephant Reads CNN

Whale Loses Fight With New Jersey Yacht Club: A Tragedy in Three Acts

Big ElephantAugust 4, 2025August 4, 2025

Oh, the humanity! Or, you know, the whale-manity! A minke whale, probably a card-carrying member of the Green Party, decided…

Titanic 2.0: Miami Vice Edition
Elephant Reads CNN

Titanic 2.0: Miami Vice Edition

Big ElephantAugust 4, 2025August 4, 2025

Another day, another tragedy – and you just KNOW the liberal deep state is behind it somehow. Three young angels…

Trump Thinks the BLS is Rigged Like a Casino Game – Here’s How Math Works, Apparently
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Thinks the BLS is Rigged Like a Casino Game – Here’s How Math Works, Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 4, 2025August 4, 2025

Oh, the Deep State’s at it again! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, has uncovered yet another leftist plot to…

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