Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Brain Fart: Nukes Are Back, Baby! (Experts Scratch Their Heads)
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Brain Fart: Nukes Are Back, Baby! (Experts Scratch Their Heads)

Big ElephantOctober 31, 2025October 31, 2025

The liberal media is at it again, folks! They’re twisting President Trump’s words about nuclear testing like they twist everything…

FBI Director Claims Halloween Terror Plot Foiled, World Rejoices (Sarcasm Alert)
Elephant Reads CNN

FBI Director Claims Halloween Terror Plot Foiled, World Rejoices (Sarcasm Alert)

Big ElephantOctober 31, 2025October 31, 2025

Another day, another foiled terrorist plot, thanks to the tireless patriots at the FBI – now under the brilliant leadership…

Luke Bryan’s Guide to Handling Grief: Treat Her Like She’s Still Hogging the TV Remote
Elephant Reads CNN

Luke Bryan’s Guide to Handling Grief: Treat Her Like She’s Still Hogging the TV Remote

Big ElephantOctober 31, 2025October 31, 2025

Oh, CNN, always bringing us the hard-hitting news! Ashley Judd needs to “heal trauma” to grieve her mother? Sounds like…

Your Vote “On the Line” (Like Your Sanity After Watching CNN)
Elephant Reads CNN

Your Vote “On the Line” (Like Your Sanity After Watching CNN)

Big ElephantOctober 30, 2025October 30, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN, the Ministry of Misinformation, is wailing about “gerrymandering” again! As if those commie Democrats wouldn’t draw…

Immigration Judge Shows Mercy on Chicago Dad Whose Kid Has the Big C
Elephant Reads CNN

Immigration Judge Shows Mercy on Chicago Dad Whose Kid Has the Big C

Big ElephantOctober 30, 2025October 30, 2025

Another sob story from the liberal media! They parade this poor illegal immigrant around because his daughter has cancer. And…

OMG! Apple Accidentally Leaks iPhone 17 Sales Data (Spoiler: It’s Doomed)
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Apple Accidentally Leaks iPhone 17 Sales Data (Spoiler: It’s Doomed)

Big ElephantOctober 30, 2025October 30, 2025

Oh, the Deep State’s favorite fruit peddler, Apple, released their quarterly earnings, and you won’t believe the spin they’re trying…

2025 Campaign Trail: Democrats Already Eyeing 2028 Because 2024 Is So Last Year
Elephant Reads CNN

2025 Campaign Trail: Democrats Already Eyeing 2028 Because 2024 Is So Last Year

Big ElephantOctober 30, 2025October 30, 2025

The 2025 campaign trail has turned into a clown show for 2028 hopefuls, all desperate to save the failing Democratic…

Rare Earth Minerals: Shiny Rocks Trump’s Obsessed With (and China Has)
Elephant Reads CNN

Rare Earth Minerals: Shiny Rocks Trump’s Obsessed With (and China Has)

Big ElephantOctober 30, 2025October 30, 2025

Another brilliant move by President Trump! He’s making deals and draining the swamp, one rare-earth mineral at a time! The…

5 Things You Gotta Know on Oct 30 (Or Not): Trumpy-Xi Pow-Wow, Boom Boom Nukes, Hurricane “Meh-lissa,” Starving People, and Art Thieves at the Louvre, LOL
Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things You Gotta Know on Oct 30 (Or Not): Trumpy-Xi Pow-Wow, Boom Boom Nukes, Hurricane “Meh-lissa,” Starving People, and Art Thieves at the Louvre, LOL

Big ElephantOctober 30, 2025October 30, 2025

Another day, another excuse for the liberal media to whine about something. But fear not, patriots, because your favorite President…

Cuomo’s Comedy Show: Is NYC Doomed or Nah
Elephant Reads CNN

Cuomo’s Comedy Show: Is NYC Doomed or Nah

Big ElephantOctober 30, 2025October 30, 2025

Of course, the “Prince of Darkness,” Andrew Cuomo, is back, desperately trying to claw his way into the NYC mayoral…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 236 237 238 … 388 Next

Latest posts

  • Hollywood Colorist Fired After Accidentally Leaving Color In Film
  • Republicans Get Discount on Brainwashing Americans with TV Ads
  • Bari Weiss Facing Credible Allegations Of Doing Journalism
  • Ed Sheeran Collects Iconic Movie Props Like Batman Suits
  • Hayley Williams Launches Solo Tour in West Palm Beach

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.