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Category: Elephant Reads CNN

Oops! Texas Emergency Managers Blame Staff Cuts for Epic Fail, Ex-NOAA Boss Throws Shade
Elephant Reads CNN

Oops! Texas Emergency Managers Blame Staff Cuts for Epic Fail, Ex-NOAA Boss Throws Shade

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, the Deep State’s at it again, folks! Now they’re blaming “staff cuts” for Texas’s emergency response. Sure, it couldn’t…

CNN: Justice Department Says Epstein Did Himself In, No Juicy Client List to See Here, Folks
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Justice Department Says Epstein Did Himself In, No Juicy Client List to See Here, Folks

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

The Justice Department, under the iron fist of President Trump, is now saying there’s no “client list” from that scumbag…

CNN: Trump and Bibi’s Excellent Iranian Adventure: The Sequel
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Trump and Bibi’s Excellent Iranian Adventure: The Sequel

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, CNN, always spinning tales of “stabilization” after President Trump’s *unprecedented* smackdown of Iran. Unprecedented because no other President had…

“OMG! U.S. Is Giving Away Free Stuff (But Only in Like, a Million Tiny Zones)”
Elephant Reads CNN

“OMG! U.S. Is Giving Away Free Stuff (But Only in Like, a Million Tiny Zones)”

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

CNN is at it again, folks! They’re whining about President Trump’s tariffs, claiming companies are using “Depression-era” policies to avoid…

Tesla Stock Goes Down the Toilet After Trump Calls Elon “Off the Rails,” Nobody Surprised
Elephant Reads CNN

Tesla Stock Goes Down the Toilet After Trump Calls Elon “Off the Rails,” Nobody Surprised

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, the humanity! Or should I say, the liberal lunacy! Elon Musk, once a beacon of innovation, has apparently succumbed…

JD Vance, the Brains Behind Trump’s Foreign Policy? You Gotta Be Kidding Me
Elephant Reads CNN

JD Vance, the Brains Behind Trump’s Foreign Policy? You Gotta Be Kidding Me

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, CNN is at it again, trying to make our great VP Vance look like he’s changed his mind. These…

Camp Mystic’s Soggy Apocalypse: 27 Campers Take a Dive, Counselors Join the Underwater Party
Elephant Reads CNN

Camp Mystic’s Soggy Apocalypse: 27 Campers Take a Dive, Counselors Join the Underwater Party

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Another day, another tragedy, and you just know the liberal media is going to blame President Trump somehow. A girls’…

Pennsylvania Man’s Head-Chopping TikTok Career to Continue in Court
Elephant Reads CNN

Pennsylvania Man’s Head-Chopping TikTok Career to Continue in Court

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Another day, another unhinged leftist bites the dust! Justin Mohn, the Pennsylvania psycho who beheaded his father and posted it…

Oops! All 7 “Missing” Folks Found (and Extra Crispy) at Exploded Fireworks Warehouse
Elephant Reads CNN

Oops! All 7 “Missing” Folks Found (and Extra Crispy) at Exploded Fireworks Warehouse

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Another day, another tragedy, but let’s be honest, folks, is this really just an accident? A fireworks warehouse explodes in…

Stocks Soar While Wall Street Sweats Tariffs (LOL)
Elephant Reads CNN

Stocks Soar While Wall Street Sweats Tariffs (LOL)

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, Wall Street’s “highly anticipating” what President Trump’s about to unleash? More like trembling in their overpriced boots! These traders…

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