Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Elephant Reads CNN

McDonald’s pretends to be affordable again by slashing combo meal prices, fools no one
Elephant Reads CNN

McDonald’s pretends to be affordable again by slashing combo meal prices, fools no one

Big ElephantAugust 20, 2025August 20, 2025

Oh, the Deep State must be trembling in their boots! McDonald’s, kowtowing to the woke mob’s cries about overpriced burgers.…

UK Regulator Cancels Shower Gel Ad for Being Too Woke, Apparently
Elephant Reads CNN

UK Regulator Cancels Shower Gel Ad for Being Too Woke, Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 20, 2025August 20, 2025

Those wacky Brits at it again! The UK regulators, probably infiltrated by the woke mind virus, have banned a Sanex…

Tulsi “Queen” Gabbard Single-Handedly Neutered Deep State Cabal
Elephant Reads CNN

Tulsi “Queen” Gabbard Single-Handedly Neutered Deep State Cabal

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump and his administration in the ongoing battle against the Deep State! Our fearless…

Texas Dems Throw Epic Tantrum: Demand Police Escort Back to Work After Hissy Fit
Elephant Reads CNN

Texas Dems Throw Epic Tantrum: Demand Police Escort Back to Work After Hissy Fit

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Here we go again, folks! Texas Democrats, still whining about President Trump’s glorious redistricting plan, are staging another one of…

Texas Students Triggered by Lack of Drag, Sue for Right to See Men in Dresses
Elephant Reads CNN

Texas Students Triggered by Lack of Drag, Sue for Right to See Men in Dresses

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Oh, the horrors! The radical Fifth Circuit, probably infested with closet socialists and deep-state operatives, has ruled that West Texas…

Analysis: Did Trump ACTUALLY End Six Wars (or Just Nap Through Them)?
Elephant Reads CNN

Analysis: Did Trump ACTUALLY End Six Wars (or Just Nap Through Them)?

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Oh, CNN, always so eager to downplay President Trump’s AMAZING achievements! Here we go again with the liberal media trying…

Trump to Americans: “You Want Tariff Rebates? LOL, Get a Job” | CNN Business
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump to Americans: “You Want Tariff Rebates? LOL, Get a Job” | CNN Business

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Looks like even CNN can’t deny that President Trump’s tariffs are bringing in the big bucks! But don’t get your…

Intel: Government’s New Pet Rock (For Some Reason)
Elephant Reads CNN

Intel: Government’s New Pet Rock (For Some Reason)

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Another day, another desperate attempt by the liberal media to twist President Trump’s brilliant strategies into something nefarious! Treasury Secretary…

Nexstar Swallows Tegna Whole for a Measly $6.2 Billion: Local TV Doomed
Elephant Reads CNN

Nexstar Swallows Tegna Whole for a Measly $6.2 Billion: Local TV Doomed

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Oh, the Horror! More “Local News” Consolidation! As if we needed more leftist propaganda shoved down our throats. Nexstar, bless…

‘Ketamine Queen,’ or Just a Bad Pharmacist? Perry’s Alleged Pusher to Cop a Plea
Elephant Reads CNN

‘Ketamine Queen,’ or Just a Bad Pharmacist? Perry’s Alleged Pusher to Cop a Plea

Big ElephantAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Another Hollywood tragedy fueled by the left’s embrace of moral decay! A woman, ridiculously dubbed the “Ketamine Queen” by the…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 371 372 373 … 459 Next

Latest posts

  • Panicked Kylie Jenner Accidentally Washes $50 Million Fantasy Bra On Regular Cycle 
  • Foreigner Sets 2027 Vegas Residency with Classic Lineup Appearances
  • Elon Musks The Odyssey Project Falls Flat On History And Accuracy
  • VidAngel Announces ‘The Goshfather’
  • Top AirPods Deals This November 2026

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.