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Category: Music News

Trump Gives Swift and Kelce Two Weeks to Procreate: “We Must Make America Fertile Again!”
The Kelce-Swift Ultimatum: Why Trump Demands a Baby From Them Right Now
Music News

Trump Gives Swift and Kelce Two Weeks to Procreate: “We Must Make America Fertile Again!”

FinnAugust 27, 2025August 27, 2025

In an exclusive statement that shook the foundations of the civilized world and caused a sharp spike in Xanax prescriptions,…

AVATAR Drops New Album Title So Basic It Hurts, Unleashes ‘Tonight We Must Be Warriors’ Video (Yawn)
Breaking, Music News

AVATAR Drops New Album Title So Basic It Hurts, Unleashes ‘Tonight We Must Be Warriors’ Video (Yawn)

Chord F. DiscordAugust 27, 2025August 27, 2025

AVATAR (aka that Swedish metal band your cousin pretends to like) – featuring the majestic vocal stylings of Johannes Eckerström…

STELLAR CIRCUITS to unleash 3rd album, ‘Phantom :: Phoenix’ – Prepare for eargasms in November
Breaking, Music News

STELLAR CIRCUITS to unleash 3rd album, ‘Phantom :: Phoenix’ – Prepare for eargasms in November

Chord F. DiscordAugust 27, 2025August 27, 2025

Oh, great, another band thinks they’ve discovered fire 🔥. North Carolina’s STELLAR CIRCUITS, who apparently made some noise last year…

Cradle of Filth Minus One Dude: Still Filthy, Still Filthy-ing
Breaking, Music News

Cradle of Filth Minus One Dude: Still Filthy, Still Filthy-ing

Chord F. DiscordAugust 27, 2025August 27, 2025

CRADLE OF FILTH, those purveyors of symphonic black metal (or whatever Dani Filth is calling it these days), graced Montevideo,…

STATIC-X Bassist Reminisces About Hanging With The Prince Of Darkness: “Ozzy Was, Like, Totally Awesome, Man”
Breaking, Music News

STATIC-X Bassist Reminisces About Hanging With The Prince Of Darkness: “Ozzy Was, Like, Totally Awesome, Man”

Chord F. DiscordAugust 26, 2025August 26, 2025

So, apparently, according to PipemanRadio at the totally important Bloodstock Open Air festival (never heard of it), STATIC-X bassist Tony…

FILTER’s Richard Patrick Laments Lack of Existential Dread in Today’s Pop Music
Breaking, Music News

FILTER’s Richard Patrick Laments Lack of Existential Dread in Today’s Pop Music

Chord F. DiscordAugust 26, 2025August 26, 2025

During a groundbreaking 🤯 interview on “Whiplash”, the KLOS radio show hosted by the one and only Full Metal Jackie…

The Offspring drops ‘Truth In Fiction’ video, proving they’re still a band
Breaking, Music News

The Offspring drops ‘Truth In Fiction’ video, proving they’re still a band

Chord F. DiscordAugust 26, 2025August 26, 2025

OMG! 🙄 The geriatric punk rockers THE OFFSPRING, who are probably older than your grandpa,👴 just dropped a music video…

The Biggest PR Stunt of 2025: Broke Musicians Are Fleeing Spotify Just So You’ll Finally Hear of Them
The Virtual Queue to Oblivion: How Godspeed You! Black Emperor Got in Line Behind Xiu Xiu to Fight Killer Robots
Music News

The Biggest PR Stunt of 2025: Broke Musicians Are Fleeing Spotify Just So You’ll Finally Hear of Them

Chord F. DiscordAugust 25, 2025August 25, 2025

In a world where a “like” is currency and a “share” is an act of civil courage, a new drama…

Glenn Hughes to Play One Last Show – Probably His Last, Maybe Not, Who Knows
Breaking, Music News

Glenn Hughes to Play One Last Show – Probably His Last, Maybe Not, Who Knows

Chord F. DiscordAugust 25, 2025August 25, 2025

So, apparently, Glenn Hughes, the guy who sang high notes that shattered glass and probably annoyed dogs, was yapping on…

Ex-I PREVAIL Singer Throws Tantrum, Blames Band for His Inevitable Solo Flop
Breaking, Music News

Ex-I PREVAIL Singer Throws Tantrum, Blames Band for His Inevitable Solo Flop

Chord F. DiscordAugust 25, 2025August 25, 2025

Oh, the drama! 🙄 Ex-I PREVAIL vocalist Brian “Needs-Attention” Burkheiser, is now whining that “an unresolved dispute” with his former…

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Finn December 31, 2025
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