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Category: Breaking

Original AC/DC Singer DAVE EVANS Recalls Band’s First Show: ‘It Was Packed To The Rafters… and So Were My Pants’
Breaking, Music News

Original AC/DC Singer DAVE EVANS Recalls Band’s First Show: ‘It Was Packed To The Rafters… and So Were My Pants’

Chord F. DiscordDecember 28, 2025December 28, 2025

When AC/DC Got Their Name: A Tale of Sewing Machines, Sister-In-Law Sorcery, and the Power of Not Paying Your Singer…

At Least 1 Killed After Helicopter Collision in New Jersey, Officials Say and 1000 People Had Enough
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

At Least 1 Killed After Helicopter Collision in New Jersey, Officials Say and 1000 People Had Enough

Big ElephantDecember 28, 2025December 28, 2025

Hammonton, New Jersey (AP) — In a stunning act of aerial incompetence that only the liberal elites could orchestrate, two…

Singer SILJE WERGELAND Finally Escapes THE GATHERING After 16 Years of Forced Hugs and Atmospheric Drudgery
Breaking, Music News

Singer SILJE WERGELAND Finally Escapes THE GATHERING After 16 Years of Forced Hugs and Atmospheric Drudgery

Chord F. DiscordDecember 28, 2025December 28, 2025

🚨BREAKING: Silje Wergeland Leaves THE GATHERING After 16 Years — Fans Panic, Keyboardist Cries Into His Synth Pad 🎹😭 In…

‘Avatar: Fire and Ash’ Burns Through Cash Like a Na’vi Bonfire Party
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

‘Avatar: Fire and Ash’ Burns Through Cash Like a Na’vi Bonfire Party

Big ElephantDecember 28, 2025December 28, 2025

Leftist Hollywood’s Latest Propaganda Piece “Avatar: Fire and Ash” Burns Through $760 Million, Proves Even Aliens Can’t Escape the Woke…

SEAN KILLIAN Catches PHIL DEMMEL Trying to Bury VIO-LENCE in 2023 and Declares Him the Ultimate Party Pooper
Breaking, Music News

SEAN KILLIAN Catches PHIL DEMMEL Trying to Bury VIO-LENCE in 2023 and Declares Him the Ultimate Party Pooper

Chord F. DiscordDecember 28, 2025December 28, 2025

When Thrash Metal Meets Soap Opera: VIO-LENCE’s Breakup Drama Makes Reality TV Look Boring 😂🎸 In a plot twist that…

Warren Buffett Hangs Up His Hat and Berkshire Hathaway’s Stock Price Immediately Starts Doing the Macarena
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Warren Buffett Hangs Up His Hat and Berkshire Hathaway’s Stock Price Immediately Starts Doing the Macarena

Big ElephantDecember 27, 2025December 27, 2025

Warren Buffett’s Last Laugh: The Great American Grift Comes to an End as the Oracle of Omaha Finally Hangs Up…

The NYPD Finally Found Its Perfect Leader: A Mayor Who Thinks He Can Fix Everything With a Powerpoint Presentation
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

The NYPD Finally Found Its Perfect Leader: A Mayor Who Thinks He Can Fix Everything With a Powerpoint Presentation

Big ElephantDecember 27, 2025December 27, 2025

NYC Crime Plummets Under Trump-Era Policing While Mamdani Prepares to Import Venezuela-Style Chaos In a stunning rebuke to liberal governance,…

Does creatine live up to the hype? Or is it just expensive water weight for gym bros with ego lifts
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Does creatine live up to the hype? Or is it just expensive water weight for gym bros with ego lifts

Big ElephantDecember 27, 2025December 27, 2025

Yet Another Liberal “Miracle” Supplement Promised to Fix Everything from Gym Gains to Global Warming—Spoiler: It’s Just Salt and Hype…

Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die – Gore Verbinski’s Time Traveling Circus Starring Sam Rockwell Drops Poster
Breaking, Movie News

Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die – Gore Verbinski’s Time Traveling Circus Starring Sam Rockwell Drops Poster

FinnDecember 26, 2025December 26, 2025

In a bold new cinematic experience that will make you question your life choices, Gore Verbinski’s latest film “Good Luck,…

ANDI DERIS Claims VAN HALEN’s Disaster Reunion Was HELLOWEEN’s Wake-Up Call to Not Screw the Pooch
Breaking, Music News

ANDI DERIS Claims VAN HALEN’s Disaster Reunion Was HELLOWEEN’s Wake-Up Call to Not Screw the Pooch

Chord F. DiscordDecember 26, 2025December 26, 2025

Andi Deris Just Dropped Some HILARIOUS And Absolutely Savage Truth Bombs About HELLOWEEN’s Reunion, And It Involves VAN HALEN’s Epic…

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Latest posts

  • Get Ready for the Most Epic Alien Invasion Film Ever Because Steven Spielberg is Finally Going to Reveal the Truth About Earrings and Fashion Disasters from the 80s in Disclosure Day
  • Fake news ABC whines about Trump’s FCC crushing liberal broadcast thugs
  • Buckethead in Charlotte, NC (05/28/2026)
  • Get Ready for the Most Epic R&B Party on a Rooftop That Will Probably End with a Noise Complaint and a Visit from the Police
  • OH JOY Another Has Been from the 80s is Desperately Trying to be Relevant Again with Their Super Original Sounding Solo Album Called Dirty Foot Lane Wow What a Unique Title

Editorial
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Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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