Tuomas Holopainen somehow still has ideas for Nightwish songs
I just can’t even contain my excitement right now. I mean, who needs actual music when you can just hear…
Category: Breaking
Trump Now Ruining Lakes and Legends One Ego Trip at Time
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems President Trump is at it again, threatening to raze…
Alaska Voters Delightfully Confused By Two Dan Sullivans
I’m sipping my morning coffee and reading about the latest news from Alaska, where it seems we’ve got a real…
Trump Scrapes Together South Carolina Win Somehow
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. President Donald Trump just got a much-needed win in South Carolina,…
Oh Joy Because the World Was Missing a Robocop Remake Dan Stevens is Now a Robot Cop with More Drama and Less Explosions Probably
Breaking News: Robocop is Back, and This Time He’s Not Just a Cop, He’s a TV Star 🚨👮♂️! But honestly,…
Secret Service Officials Get Time Off For Bad Behavior Apparently
Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama at the Secret Service, and let me tell you,…
Another Icon Lost Just in Time for the Biopic Pitch Meetings
This one hurts. Dolly Parton, beloved country music legend and movie star, an entertainer who crossed genres and generations, died…
Another Soulless Blockbuster Climbs The Soulless Box Office List
Move over Avengers, the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man has taken the top spot. With a whopping $858.4 million in ticket sales…
Family Reunion Ends With Record Breaking Number of Unsolicited Opinions
I’m sipping my coffee and reading about a story that’s just, well, unbelievable. A man killed eight of his relatives,…
Navy Sailor’s Dad Freed From Immigration Custody Because Priorities
I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest news, and folks, I’ve got to say, this one’s a doozy.…