Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

Pokémon TCG Pocket: Prepare for Eldritch Horrors from Dimensions We Didn’t Even Know We Needed to Exploit For Cardboard
Breaking

Pokémon TCG Pocket: Prepare for Eldritch Horrors from Dimensions We Didn’t Even Know We Needed to Exploit For Cardboard

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 24, 2025May 24, 2025

OMG, you guys, they’re STILL milking this Pokemon TCG Pocket thing? 🙄 Like, haven’t they heard of, I don’t know,…

Oh Noes! More Time to Panic About Those Comic Book Thingies Being Late!
Breaking

Oh Noes! More Time to Panic About Those Comic Book Thingies Being Late!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 24, 2025May 24, 2025

Oh, the humanity! Or, you know, the Marvel Cinematic Universe-ity. Those “epic” Avengers movies, Doomsday and Secret Wars, have been…

Anime North 2025: Toronto’s Cosplay Catastrophe (You’ve Been Warned)
Breaking

Anime North 2025: Toronto’s Cosplay Catastrophe (You’ve Been Warned)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 24, 2025May 24, 2025

Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because Toronto is about to be invaded by… *checks notes* …Anime North. Yes, that’s right, the…

Todd Sucherman of STYX Reveals Shocking Truth: Drummers are Basically Just Flailing, Rhythmically-Challenged Garbage People
Breaking

Todd Sucherman of STYX Reveals Shocking Truth: Drummers are Basically Just Flailing, Rhythmically-Challenged Garbage People

Chord F. DiscordMay 24, 2025May 24, 2025

In a shocking exposé with The UK Drum Show Official Podcast (because who ELSE would interview him?), STYX drummer and…

Ron ‘Bumblefoot’ Thal: Proves Music Can Unite Even the Most Hopelessly Clueless (Probably)
Breaking

Ron ‘Bumblefoot’ Thal: Proves Music Can Unite Even the Most Hopelessly Clueless (Probably)

Chord F. DiscordMay 24, 2025May 24, 2025

Bumblefoot, the guy who played guitar in Guns N’ Roses for, like, five minutes, is now telling us all about…

Miranda Lambert’s “Over You”: Turns Out Blake Shelton’s Dad Was the Real Muse (and We’re Shocked!)
Breaking

Miranda Lambert’s “Over You”: Turns Out Blake Shelton’s Dad Was the Real Muse (and We’re Shocked!)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 23, 2025May 23, 2025

So, apparently, America’s Sweetheart (before she wasn’t), Miranda Lambert, snagged a No. 1 hit with “Over You.” And guess what?…

MTG: Final Fantasy Crossover – Homebases? More Like Home-BASED-ic
Breaking

MTG: Final Fantasy Crossover – Homebases? More Like Home-BASED-ic

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 23, 2025May 23, 2025

Oh boy, another crossover event! As if we didn’t have enough excuses to drain our bank accounts already. This time…

Kelly Hansen Flees Foreigner Before They Realize He’s Not Lou Gramm
Breaking

Kelly Hansen Flees Foreigner Before They Realize He’s Not Lou Gramm

Chord F. DiscordMay 23, 2025May 23, 2025

FOREIGNER’s Kelly Hansen, the guy who replaced the *real* voice, has decided to peace out. Apparently, screaming “Juke Box Hero”…

Big Wreck Still Exists, Apparently, Releases Song Called ‘Believer’ (Whatever)
Breaking

Big Wreck Still Exists, Apparently, Releases Song Called ‘Believer’ (Whatever)

Chord F. DiscordMay 23, 2025May 23, 2025

**Oh. My. Gawd. 🙄 It’s 2025 and apparently BIG WRECK is still a thing? Like, seriously? Did anyone actually ask…

Ys vs Trails: Prepare for the Crossover Nobody Asked For, But You’re Getting Anyway (Maybe) This Summer
Breaking

Ys vs Trails: Prepare for the Crossover Nobody Asked For, But You’re Getting Anyway (Maybe) This Summer

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 23, 2025May 23, 2025

Oh. My. Goodness. 🙄 Did Falcom REALLY think we wanted ANOTHER Ys game? Like, seriously? We get it, Adol is…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 354 355 356 … 381 Next

Latest posts

  • Gymshark Teams Up with Bratz to Create the Most Legendary Athleisure Line for Dolls Who Lift
  • Get Ready for a GutBusting Good Time at FoodieLand Where Your Diet Goes to Die in Fort Worth
  • More Overhyped Shows And Movies To Make You Forget You Have Responsibilities And A Social Life In June 2026
  • Computex 2026: AMD Throws a Party for Ancient AM4 Tech and Slaps a Cheap Sticker on New Stuff to Make You Feel Better About Buying Last Year’s Rejects
  • DAVID DRAIMAN Claims DISTURBED’s New Songs Are So Groundbreakingly Original You’ll Forget They’re The Same Band That’s Been Playing The Same Riff For 20 Years

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}