Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

BREAKING: Red Lobster Plans to Ruin Your Diet and Relationships with Highly Anticipated Return of the Infamous Endless Shrimp Promotion That Will Obviously End in Carb Coma and Regret
Breaking News: Red Lobster to Revive Endless Shrimp Promotion, Because Who Needs Financial Stability Anyway? 🍴👀
Breaking, Movie News

BREAKING: Red Lobster Plans to Ruin Your Diet and Relationships with Highly Anticipated Return of the Infamous Endless Shrimp Promotion That Will Obviously End in Carb Coma and Regret

FinnApril 3, 2026April 3, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, Red Lobster is rumored to be bringing back the infamous Endless Shrimp promotion that…

Wizards Beyond Waverly Place Finally Decides to Stop Torturing Us with Bad Magic After Season 3
Breaking, Movie News

Wizards Beyond Waverly Place Finally Decides to Stop Torturing Us with Bad Magic After Season 3

FinnApril 3, 2026April 3, 2026

The Disney Channel’s Disney revival of Wizards of Waverly Place is coming to an end, and honestly, it’s about time…

Oh Joy Another Overhyped Game “It Has My Face” Finally Leaves Early Access Because You Clearly Needed More Survival Horror Games With Slightly Different Mechanics And A Creepy Face On The Cover
Breaking, Games News

Oh Joy Another Overhyped Game “It Has My Face” Finally Leaves Early Access Because You Clearly Needed More Survival Horror Games With Slightly Different Mechanics And A Creepy Face On The Cover

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 3, 2026April 3, 2026

NightByte Games and Behaviour Interactive are finally done messing around with their new game, It Has My Face, and it’s…

Who cares, Iran’s no match for America’s mighty military anyway
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Who cares, Iran’s no match for America’s mighty military anyway

Big ElephantApril 3, 2026April 3, 2026

It’s a beautiful day in America, folks, and I’m thrilled to report that our great nation is still standing, despite…

Fake news praising some guy’s space kid again obviously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake news praising some guy’s space kid again obviously

Big ElephantApril 3, 2026April 3, 2026

The so-called “experts” and “fact-checkers” are at it again, trying to undermine the greatness of our beloved President Donald Trump…

liberal wimps predict endless war with Iran big shock
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

liberal wimps predict endless war with Iran big shock

Big ElephantApril 3, 2026April 3, 2026

The utter ridiculousness of the so-called “opposition” to our great President Donald Trump is on full display, folks. As of…

Tobias Forge Definitely Not Stalking Anyone But Just Happens to Know Everything About You Case Under Investigation
Breaking News: Woman Charged with Harassment for Sending Tobias Forge a Phone (Yes, You Read That Right) 📱😱
Breaking, Music News

Tobias Forge Definitely Not Stalking Anyone But Just Happens to Know Everything About You Case Under Investigation

Chord F. DiscordApril 2, 2026April 2, 2026

According to the super reliable sources at Aftonbladet, a Swedish newspaper that obviously has nothing better to do, a woman…

Ex-THE BLACK CROWES Drummer STEVE GORMAN On Latest ROCK HALL Nomination ‘I’m Secretly Counting Down the Minutes Until I Can Get Back to My Real Passion of Collecting Antique Teapots’
Breaking News: Former Black Crowes Drummer Steve Gorman Totally Not Bitter About Being Excluded from Reunion Tour 🙄
Breaking, Music News

Ex-THE BLACK CROWES Drummer STEVE GORMAN On Latest ROCK HALL Nomination ‘I’m Secretly Counting Down the Minutes Until I Can Get Back to My Real Passion of Collecting Antique Teapots’

Chord F. DiscordApril 2, 2026April 2, 2026

The Black Crowes are up for induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and former drummer Steve Gorman…

Oh Joy Another Season of Peaky Blinders Because You Clearly Havent Had Enough of Tom Hardy Looking Moody in a Newsboy Cap With a Brand New Star to Make You Forget About All the Other Stars Theyve Killed Off Already
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Season of Peaky Blinders Because You Clearly Havent Had Enough of Tom Hardy Looking Moody in a Newsboy Cap With a Brand New Star to Make You Forget About All the Other Stars Theyve Killed Off Already

FinnApril 2, 2026April 2, 2026

The Peaky Blinders franchise is back, because you clearly didn’t get enough of it the first time around 🙄. Just…

Peter Gabriel Finally Emerges From His Cave to Bless Us with New Music That Will Probably Be Played at Every Hippie Wedding for the Next Decade
Breaking News: Peter Gabriel Releases New Track and We're All Still Trying to Figure Out What It Means 🤯
Breaking, Music News

Peter Gabriel Finally Emerges From His Cave to Bless Us with New Music That Will Probably Be Played at Every Hippie Wedding for the Next Decade

Chord F. DiscordApril 2, 2026April 2, 2026

Peter Gabriel, the legendary musician and king of confusing album titles, has just dropped a new track called “Till Your…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 366 367 368 … 690 Next

Latest posts

  • Cornell doles out super harsh extra homework for sex offenders
  • Trump Declares Greenland’s Environmental Doom Imminent Very Soon Now
  • Violent Magic Orchestra in Charlotte, NC (10/13/2026)
  • Secret Chiefs 3 in Charlotte, NC (10/13/2026)
  • Igorrr in Charlotte, NC (10/13/2026)

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.