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Category: Breaking

Rise Against Vomits Out Another Anthem: ‘Ricochet’ Music Video Now Available For Your Disappointment
Breaking, Music News

Rise Against Vomits Out Another Anthem: ‘Ricochet’ Music Video Now Available For Your Disappointment

Chord F. DiscordAugust 12, 2025August 12, 2025

RISE AGAINST, those purveyors of whiny sing-alongs disguised as ‘punk rock,’ have graced us with a new single, “Ricochet,” from…

So, You Wanna Watch More Aliens, Huh, Nerd
Breaking, Movie News

So, You Wanna Watch More Aliens, Huh, Nerd

FinnAugust 11, 2025August 12, 2025

Prepare your popcorn, butter that stuff UP, and settle in, buttercups, because Alien: Earth is about to grace our screens,…

Aerosmith Reunion: Get Ready for Geriatric Rock ‘n’ Roll
Breaking, Music News

Aerosmith Reunion: Get Ready for Geriatric Rock ‘n’ Roll

Chord F. DiscordAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

So, apparently, AEROSMITH, those dinosaurs of rock, are contemplating *another* farewell concert? 😂 Like, haven’t they milked this retirement thing…

TIFF 2025: Prepare Your Wallets, Film Snobs, The Criterion Collection’s Garage Sale Hits Canada
Breaking, Movie News

TIFF 2025: Prepare Your Wallets, Film Snobs, The Criterion Collection’s Garage Sale Hits Canada

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

Prepare yourselves, peasants! The illustrious Criterion Mobile Closet, a beacon of cinematic snobbery, is gracing the plebeian lands of TIFF…

Thanos: Yeah, I’d Snap Back for the Right Price, Losers
Breaking, Movie News

Thanos: Yeah, I’d Snap Back for the Right Price, Losers

FinnAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

Thanos, that big purple grape🍇 who got turned into dust and then got his head lopped off in Avengers: Endgame…

Epica’s Simone Simons Gushes Over Symphonic Metal: ‘It Blew My Tiny Mind’
Breaking, Music News

Epica’s Simone Simons Gushes Over Symphonic Metal: ‘It Blew My Tiny Mind’

Chord F. DiscordAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

In a recent interview with some dude from Brazil 🇧🇷 (who probably thinks samba is metal), EPICA’s vocal powerhouse, Simone…

James Marsden Says ‘Avengers: Doomsday’ Is Basically Just a Cozy Slipper Now
Breaking, Movie News

James Marsden Says ‘Avengers: Doomsday’ Is Basically Just a Cozy Slipper Now

FinnAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

Oh, James Marsden is BACK as Cyclops, you guys! 🙄 Because apparently, we haven’t had enough of him squinting through…

‘Good Boy’: Finally, a Movie That Lets You See the World From a Pooch’s Perspective (Probably Full of Squirrels and Fire Hydrants)
Breaking, Movie News

‘Good Boy’: Finally, a Movie That Lets You See the World From a Pooch’s Perspective (Probably Full of Squirrels and Fire Hydrants)

FinnAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

Oh, no, not another movie where we have to Google “Does the dog die?” 🙄 Seriously, people, toughen up! If…

GDEX 2025: Prepare for one more indie game convention
Breaking, Games News

GDEX 2025: Prepare for one more indie game convention

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

Oh, look, another one of these things! The Game Devs of Color Expo 🙄 is back for its tenth year…

Fear Factory’s New Singer Somehow Convinced He’s Not Dreaming
Breaking, Music News

Fear Factory’s New Singer Somehow Convinced He’s Not Dreaming

Chord F. DiscordAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

In an interview with the Mike James Rock Show 🎤 (because who else would care?), FEAR FACTORY’s new singer Milo…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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