Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

“We Did It All For You,” New World Devs Cry in Farewell Note Hidden in Final Update (LOL!)
Breaking, Games News

“We Did It All For You,” New World Devs Cry in Farewell Note Hidden in Final Update (LOL!)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 3, 2025November 3, 2025

🤣 Oh no, the poor, poor *New World: Aeternum* is getting the axe! 🪓 Who could have possibly seen this…

Spartacus: House of Ashur – Oh Great, Another Trailer We Totally Asked For
Breaking, Movie News

Spartacus: House of Ashur – Oh Great, Another Trailer We Totally Asked For

FinnNovember 3, 2025November 3, 2025

STARZ, bless their cotton socks, 🙄 has decided to unleash upon us Spartacus: House of Ashur, because apparently, we haven’t…

Metallica Fans Risk Life and Limb (and a Night in the Clink) for a Glimpse of Papa Het’s receding Hairline
Breaking, Music News

Metallica Fans Risk Life and Limb (and a Night in the Clink) for a Glimpse of Papa Het’s receding Hairline

Chord F. DiscordNovember 3, 2025November 3, 2025

So, like, apparently, two dudes who thought they were auditioning for the ‘Tallica circus decided to channel their inner Spider-Man…

KORN Guitarist BRIAN ‘HEAD’ WELCH Drops Truth Bomb: Religion, Still Messing Things Up After All These Years, Who Knew
Breaking, Music News

KORN Guitarist BRIAN ‘HEAD’ WELCH Drops Truth Bomb: Religion, Still Messing Things Up After All These Years, Who Knew

Chord F. DiscordNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

Brian “Head” Welch, the dude who bailed on KORN in ’05 ’cause he found Jesus (or maybe Jesus found his…

Gerard Butler and Morena Baccarin Star in Greenland 2: Migration? Oh, the Humanity
Breaking, Movie News

Gerard Butler and Morena Baccarin Star in Greenland 2: Migration? Oh, the Humanity

FinnNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

Oh, look, another disaster movie starring Gerard Butler! 🙄 Because apparently, the world hasn’t suffered enough in real life, so…

MNEMIC Back From The Dead, Claims To Be “Super Excited” (We’ll See About That)
Breaking, Music News

MNEMIC Back From The Dead, Claims To Be “Super Excited” (We’ll See About That)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

In August 2024, the original lineup of Danish “djent” metal pioneers MNEMIC (yeah, we put “djent” in quotes because let’s…

Lucca Comics & Games: Proving Manga Can Be More Than Just Big Eyes and Explosions Since Forever
Breaking

Lucca Comics & Games: Proving Manga Can Be More Than Just Big Eyes and Explosions Since Forever

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

So, like, some dude named Tetsuo Hara, who apparently drew some stuff for Fist of the North Star 🌠 (never…

Mike Richardson: 40 Years of Dark Horse and Still No Batman
Breaking, Movie News

Mike Richardson: 40 Years of Dark Horse and Still No Batman

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

Dark Horse Comics, oh, you sweet summer child of the comics industry. Known for *cough* “classics” like Hellboy (the movie…

Twitch: From Geeks to Global Domination (One Emote at a Time)
Breaking, Games News

Twitch: From Geeks to Global Domination (One Emote at a Time)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

Okay, so like, in 2011, Twitch was born from the ashes of Justin.tv, because apparently, people actually wanted to watch…

DEATH ANGEL Drops New Single ‘Wrath (Bring Fire)’ – Is It Hot or Just Lukewarm
Breaking

DEATH ANGEL Drops New Single ‘Wrath (Bring Fire)’ – Is It Hot or Just Lukewarm

Chord F. DiscordNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

Wow, hold onto your dentures, folks!👵👴 The geriatrics of thrash metal, DEATH ANGEL, bless their ancient souls, have finally cranked…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 530 531 532 … 678 Next

Latest posts

  • OpenAI Fires Safety Team Because Who Needs Safety Anyway
  • Spin of the Day: The American Academy of Pediatrics advocates for a nationwide ban on raw milk due to health risks. — 6% Mostly Reality
  • US Debt Reaches Trillion Dollar Milestone Again Because Of Course
  • AI Helps Iranian Operatives Fake News Like Pros
  • Loretta Lynn Album Produced By Jack White Returns To Streaming Soon

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.