Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

Pet Shop Boys to Play Somber Gig for Dead Guy No One Can Pronounce
Breaking

Pet Shop Boys to Play Somber Gig for Dead Guy No One Can Pronounce

Chord F. DiscordJune 4, 2025June 4, 2025

In a shocking turn of events that NO ONE saw coming, the Pet Shop Boys, those purveyors of vaguely melancholic…

TennoCon Turns Double Digits: Prepare for Disappointment and Warframe Updates You’ll Complain About
Breaking

TennoCon Turns Double Digits: Prepare for Disappointment and Warframe Updates You’ll Complain About

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 4, 2025June 4, 2025

Ah, Tennocon, that yearly pilgrimage to the Digital Extremes altar where we, the faithful Tenno, gather to receive our yearly…

No Man’s Sky Adds Settlement Building and Hopium for a Switch 2 Port
Breaking

No Man’s Sky Adds Settlement Building and Hopium for a Switch 2 Port

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 4, 2025June 4, 2025

Ah, No Man’s Sky, the game that launched with all the promise of a unicorn 🦄 riding a rainbow 🌈,…

Heartbroken: Band Loses Instruments, Finds New Appreciation for Silence Before AC Gig
Breaking

Heartbroken: Band Loses Instruments, Finds New Appreciation for Silence Before AC Gig

Chord F. DiscordJune 4, 2025June 4, 2025

Legendary (debatable) rockers HEART (still around?) have announced that two “irreplaceable” (eye roll) instruments were stolen from the band prior…

“Unforgettable” New Movie Guaranteed to Make You Gasp (and Maybe Snore)
Breaking

“Unforgettable” New Movie Guaranteed to Make You Gasp (and Maybe Snore)

FinnJune 4, 2025June 4, 2025

Oh boy, film “fans” are “eagerly” awaiting another pretentious art-house flick that’s apparently so mind-blowing, it’s making people gasp louder…

SEETHER And DAUGHTRY Announce Geriatric U.S. Tour With P-O-D-unk
Breaking

SEETHER And DAUGHTRY Announce Geriatric U.S. Tour With P-O-D-unk

Chord F. DiscordJune 4, 2025June 4, 2025

OMG! SEETHER and DAUGHTRY, the dynamic duo of dad-rock despair, are gracing the U.S. with their presence this fall! 🎸🤮…

SODOM Drops New Single ‘Taphephobia’ – Are They Afraid of Tap Dancing Now
Breaking

SODOM Drops New Single ‘Taphephobia’ – Are They Afraid of Tap Dancing Now

Chord F. DiscordJune 4, 2025June 4, 2025

OMG! 😱 Thrash metal dinosaurs SODOM, who probably still think it’s cool to wear studded belts indoors, have dropped a…

3 Forgotten Flops You Can Hate-Watch in June 2025
Breaking

3 Forgotten Flops You Can Hate-Watch in June 2025

FinnJune 4, 2025June 3, 2025

If you’re desperately clawing for something to watch and have exhausted every cat video on YouTube, “Watch With Us” is…

SHARE ROSS: VIXEN Got Too Real, Had to Bounce Before the Feels Hit
Breaking

SHARE ROSS: VIXEN Got Too Real, Had to Bounce Before the Feels Hit

Chord F. DiscordJune 3, 2025June 3, 2025

In a groundbreaking interview with Metal-Net (because who else would care?), former VIXEN bassist Share Ross, yes, *that* Share Ross,…

Cillian Murphy Milked for ’28 Years Later’ Trilogy: Only Shows Up After 2 Movies, Danny Boyle Begs for Cash
Breaking

Cillian Murphy Milked for ’28 Years Later’ Trilogy: Only Shows Up After 2 Movies, Danny Boyle Begs for Cash

FinnJune 3, 2025June 3, 2025

So, Cillian Murphy, that guy who peaked in “Oppenheimer” (let’s be real, he was just okay in “28 Days Later”)…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 560 561 562 … 598 Next

Latest posts

  • Feds May Crash Your Voting Party
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald Trump leads the Counter Revolution movement
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald J Trump endorses James Uthmeier for Florida Attorney General
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald Trump leads counter revolution movement
  • Fall Brings Cozy Sweaters And Higher Gas Prices

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.