Oh honey, let’s dive headfirst into the cinematic masterpiece that is Dust Bunny, brought to you by the one and only Bryan Fuller – you know, the dude who gave us “Hannibal,” which was totally not overrated, and “Pushing Daisies,” which definitely had a HUGE fanbase.
Prepare for a “fantastical” and “wickedly inventive” experience, where a 10-year-old teams up with her hitman neighbor to battle their inner demons! 🙄 Because that’s totally normal. And OMG, Mads Mikkelsen is back! Can we give him another standing ovation just for existing? I am sure that the movie is not going to flop.
So, little Aurora (who is totally not a Mary Sue) thinks a monster ate her family! What else could it be? And her neighbor just so happens to be a hitman! How convenient! So, she hires him to off this dust bunny monstrosity. Turns out, maybe her parents were collateral damage in his hitman shenanigans. Oops! Now he’s gotta protect this kid from assassins and, like, face the reality that monsters are real? Groundbreaking! 💀
But wait, there’s more! We’ve got Sophie Sloan, Sigourney Weaver (because every movie needs a token legendary actress), and David Dastmalchian (who is always typecasted as the weird guy). So much talent, so little originality.
Mark your calendars, folks! December 5th, 2025, is the day we witness this cinematic triumph. I give it 2/10, just because of Mads 🤪. Save your money and watch paint dry; it will be a better use of your time. 🗑️
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
