Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

Galactic Cash Grabs: Sequel Era Books and Comics Worth Your Credits
Breaking, Movie News

Galactic Cash Grabs: Sequel Era Books and Comics Worth Your Credits

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 16, 2026August 16, 2026

It’s time to dive into the wonderful world of Star Wars, where the Sequel era has been getting a bad…

Navy Life: Where Squalor Meets Camaraderie At Sea Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Navy Life: Where Squalor Meets Camaraderie At Sea Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 16, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the USS Abraham Lincoln, and folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this…

Desperate Family Turns to Psychics Because That’s Going Great Historically
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Desperate Family Turns to Psychics Because That’s Going Great Historically

Big ElephantAugust 16, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A 15-year-old girl named Sophie Reeder has been missing for over…

Dave Mustaine Credits Divine Intervention For Not Dying Yet
Breaking, Music News

Dave Mustaine Credits Divine Intervention For Not Dying Yet

Chord F. DiscordAugust 16, 2026August 16, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some feels? 🤯 Dave Mustaine, the legendary Megadeth frontman, just went live on…

PLUSH finally gives us the nu metal revival we never asked for
Breaking, Music News

PLUSH finally gives us the nu metal revival we never asked for

Chord F. DiscordAugust 16, 2026August 16, 2026

I just heard that PLUSH has released a new single, “Animalistic”, and I’m still trying to pick up the pieces…

Another Beloved Franchise Sacrificed to the Altar of Endless Merchandising Opportunities
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

Another Beloved Franchise Sacrificed to the Altar of Endless Merchandising Opportunities

FinnAugust 16, 2026August 16, 2026

The Kingdom Hearts franchise is getting an anime series, because what’s a beloved gaming property without a TV show, right?…

Wednesday 13 teams up with John 5 because his solo career was going so well
Breaking, Music News

Wednesday 13 teams up with John 5 because his solo career was going so well

Chord F. DiscordAugust 16, 2026August 16, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤯 I just got word that Wednesday 13 is teaming…

Police Find Suspect Hiding In Closet Because That’s Always A Good Idea
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Police Find Suspect Hiding In Closet Because That’s Always A Good Idea

Big ElephantAugust 15, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about a shooting at Virginia State University, where a 19-year-old named Camron Harris…

Kingdom Hearts IV gets release date and obligatory anime cash grab
Breaking, Games News

Kingdom Hearts IV gets release date and obligatory anime cash grab

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 15, 2026August 16, 2026

Get ready, Keyblade warriors, the latest Kingdom Hearts IV trailer has dropped, and it’s a doozy. I mean, who doesn’t…

Kansas Town Buys Reporter’s Silence For Cool $850K
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Kansas Town Buys Reporter’s Silence For Cool $850K

Big ElephantAugust 15, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about a small Kansas town that’s agreed to pay a whopping $850,000 to…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 66 67 68 … 603 Next

Latest posts

  • Springsteen Unveils Live Tracks From Upcoming Concert Movie Release
  • Mars Volta Drops New Live Single Reina Tormenta Enlazan Las Tinieblas
  • Marlins Announce First 10,000 Fans At Game Will Receive Sandy Alcantara Bobblehead To Share
  • GOP’s Anti-Socialism Message Gets Trumped By Trump’s Socialism
  • Metal Legends Iron Maiden Megadeth Anthrax Invade New Jersey Stadium

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.