Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: action

Because What The World Needed Was Another Doomsday Sequel Poster Apparently
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Needed Was Another Doomsday Sequel Poster Apparently

FinnJuly 16, 2026July 16, 2026

We’ve got our hands on some brand new concept art for Avengers: Doomsday, and it’s a real treat for fans…

Trump’s Master Deal Making Skills: Nope, Says America
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Master Deal Making Skills: Nope, Says America

Big ElephantJuly 16, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. President Donald Trump has been trying to sell the Iran war…

Emberville boasts all star voice cast to distract from lackluster gameplay
Breaking, Games News

Emberville boasts all star voice cast to distract from lackluster gameplay

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 16, 2026July 16, 2026

Get ready to roll your eyes in awe at the star-studded cast of Emberville, the upcoming Action RPG from Cygnus…

Because What The World Really Needed Was Another G.I. Joe Reboot
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Really Needed Was Another G.I. Joe Reboot

FinnJuly 16, 2026July 16, 2026

A new G.I. Joe movie is coming, because of course it is. The franchise that has been lurking in the…

Trump’s Master Plan: Get Paid, Somehow, By Anyone, Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Master Plan: Get Paid, Somehow, By Anyone, Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 16, 2026

I was sipping my coffee and reading the news when I stumbled upon this article about President Trump’s foreign policy,…

Universal Throws in Towel on Failed Fast and Furious Cash Grab One Year Early
Breaking, Movie News

Universal Throws in Towel on Failed Fast and Furious Cash Grab One Year Early

FinnJuly 15, 2026July 16, 2026

The Fast & Furious attraction at Universal Studios Florida is headed toward a supercharged ending, because of course it is.…

xAI Sues User For Doing Exactly What You’d Expect With AI
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

xAI Sues User For Doing Exactly What You’d Expect With AI

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Elon Musk’s xAI is suing a user, Terry Wayne Harwood, for…

TV Station Owners About To Get Absurdly Larger Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

TV Station Owners About To Get Absurdly Larger Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) is at it again, and I’m sipping my coffee, thinking, “what’s next?” They’re changing the…

Jason Newsted gets throat cancer because your nu-metal screams werent loud enough
Breaking, Music News

Jason Newsted gets throat cancer because your nu-metal screams werent loud enough

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

Jason Newsted, the former Metallica bassist, has announced that he’s hitting the road with his band, The Chophouse Band, and…

Elon Musk’s Million Dollar Voting Habit Raises Eyebrows
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Elon Musk’s Million Dollar Voting Habit Raises Eyebrows

Big ElephantJuly 14, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Elon Musk’s latest escapade, and folks, it’s a doozy. Apparently, Musk handed out…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 6 7 8 … 67 Next

Latest posts

  • Spider-Man Breaks Box Office Records Again Because Of Course It Does
  • Why Hollywood Keeps Making the Same Movies Over and Over
  • Lita Ford somehow still alive and making music again
  • Tony Iommi still making riffs because what else is he gonna do
  • Lollapalooza 2026 Sizzles with Jennie and Wolf Alice Sets

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.