Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Agenda

Ex-UVA Student Scores 5 Life Sentences: Touchdown of Justice or Epic Fail?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Ex-UVA Student Scores 5 Life Sentences: Touchdown of Justice or Epic Fail?

Big ElephantNovember 23, 2025November 23, 2025

Another day, another tragedy fueled by the leftist agenda infiltrating our universities! A former UVA student, Christopher Darnell Jones Jr.,…

Trump’s Genius Plan to Defund Cities Backfires Spectacularly, Judges Say “Nah, Bro”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Genius Plan to Defund Cities Backfires Spectacularly, Judges Say “Nah, Bro”

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Two activist judges, probably card-carrying members of the Socialist Party, have decided they know better than President Trump when it…

Murdaugh Murders: CNN Asks If Hulu’s Fiction Is *Actually* More Real Than Reality
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Murdaugh Murders: CNN Asks If Hulu’s Fiction Is *Actually* More Real Than Reality

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Another day, another leftist propaganda piece masquerading as “entertainment”! Hulu’s “Murdaugh: Death in the Family” is out, and it’s just…

New Jersey Sports Betting Case Reveals Geriatric Mob’s Hilarious Attempt to Fleece Zoomers with Stone Age Tactics
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

New Jersey Sports Betting Case Reveals Geriatric Mob’s Hilarious Attempt to Fleece Zoomers with Stone Age Tactics

Big ElephantNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Folks, can you believe it? The Deep State’s at it again, this time trying to make it look like organized…

5 things you should pretend to care about today: Some guy named Mamdani, ‘Seditious behavior’ (yawn), Autism and vaccines (eye roll), a beauty pageant, and something happening in Gaza
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

5 things you should pretend to care about today: Some guy named Mamdani, ‘Seditious behavior’ (yawn), Autism and vaccines (eye roll), a beauty pageant, and something happening in Gaza

Big ElephantNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

Folks, let’s cut through the fake news fog! The liberal media’s trying to distract you from the REAL issues, like…

CNN discovers: Trump’s “happy talk” on inflation is a total flop, like a toddler trying to bake a cake
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN discovers: Trump’s “happy talk” on inflation is a total flop, like a toddler trying to bake a cake

Big ElephantNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

Another day, another desperate attempt by the Fake News CNN to undermine our glorious President Trump! They claim the “economy…

Vance Begs for ‘Patience’ on Economy, Hilariously Backpedaling from Trump’s MAGA Fantasies
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Vance Begs for ‘Patience’ on Economy, Hilariously Backpedaling from Trump’s MAGA Fantasies

Big ElephantNovember 20, 2025November 20, 2025

JD Vance, bless his heart, is out there trying to spin the latest fake news from the liberal media. Seems…

Trump’s master plan: Ukraine gives up land, army becomes a mime troupe
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s master plan: Ukraine gives up land, army becomes a mime troupe

Big ElephantNovember 20, 2025November 20, 2025

Another day, another attempt by the Fake News CNN to undermine our glorious President Trump! They’re peddling a “peace plan”…

Trump Threatens to Unleash the Kraken (aka Fire Bessent) if Fed Doesn’t Obey His Royal Interest Rate Demands
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Threatens to Unleash the Kraken (aka Fire Bessent) if Fed Doesn’t Obey His Royal Interest Rate Demands

Big ElephantNovember 20, 2025November 20, 2025

Fake News CNN is at it again, twisting President Trump’s words! Our glorious leader, in his infinite wisdom, is just…

BBC Bows Down to Royal Overlords After Embarrassing Title Slip-Up
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

BBC Bows Down to Royal Overlords After Embarrassing Title Slip-Up

Big ElephantNovember 19, 2025November 19, 2025

The BBC, that bastion of leftist propaganda, has groveled before royalty (and President Trump, MAGA!) after a series of unfortunate…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 31 32 33 … 99 Next

Latest posts

  • Because Your Avocado Toast Needs aSide of Guilt and Recycling
  • Level Up to Mastering the Art of Kicking Employees to the Curb with Total Confidence and Zero Guilt
  • Finally, US gov stops foreigners from stealing our awesome AI secrets
  • Liberal losers fret over impending SCOTUS smackdowns coming soon
  • Billionaire Musk survives solely on government handouts somehow

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}