Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: breaking

‘Lanterns’ Aaron Pierre Joins ‘Superman’ Sequel: Because Even Superheroes Need More Light in Their Lives
Hold onto your power rings, folks — it's time for some intergalactic crossover chaos! 🚀✨
Breaking, Movie News

‘Lanterns’ Aaron Pierre Joins ‘Superman’ Sequel: Because Even Superheroes Need More Light in Their Lives

FinnMarch 12, 2026March 12, 2026

It looks like the DC Universe just couldn’t resist the urge to play matchmaker with its cosmic cops. Aaron Pierre,…

2026 BAFTA Game Awards Nominees: The Ones Who Stayed Awake Long Enough to Be Considered
BAFTA 2026 Game Awards Nominations: The Gaming World Holds Its Breath (Or Maybe Just Its Stomach)
Breaking, Games News

2026 BAFTA Game Awards Nominees: The Ones Who Stayed Awake Long Enough to Be Considered

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 12, 2026March 12, 2026

The 22nd BAFTA Game Awards 2026 is rapidly approaching, and we now have access to the full list of nominations.…

Oscars Add More Guards Because FBI Thinks Terrorists Want Red Carpet Selfies Too
The Oscars Are Doubling Down on Security Because Apparently Iran Wants to Drone-Bomb Hollywood's Biggest Night
Breaking, Movie News

Oscars Add More Guards Because FBI Thinks Terrorists Want Red Carpet Selfies Too

FinnMarch 12, 2026March 12, 2026

Well, well, well, look who’s decided to go full Fort Knox for a night of self-congratulatory back-patting! The 98th Academy…

‘Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory’ Is a Secret Massacre Movie That Will Make You Question Your Childhood
Why Willy Wonka Is Secretly a Slasher Movie
Breaking, Movie News

‘Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory’ Is a Secret Massacre Movie That Will Make You Question Your Childhood

FinnMarch 12, 2026March 12, 2026

If I wanted to torture my brother when we were kids, I only needed to say two words: “Blueberry Girl.”…

CNN Exclusive: Russia Gives Iran Top Secret Drone Tips to Annoy Uncle Sam Even More
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Exclusive: Russia Gives Iran Top Secret Drone Tips to Annoy Uncle Sam Even More

Big ElephantMarch 11, 2026March 11, 2026

Breaking: Russia Gifts Iran “How to Annoy America” Drone Masterclass Well, well, well — if it isn’t the plot of…

Fortnite Save The World Will Finally Stop Nickel-and-Diming Us, Just Kidding It’s Still Fortnite
Breaking, Games News

Fortnite Save The World Will Finally Stop Nickel-and-Diming Us, Just Kidding It’s Still Fortnite

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 11, 2026March 11, 2026

After years of being the paid sibling that nobody talked about at parties, Fortnite Save The World is finally stepping…

Bungie Caves Again, Makes Marathon NPCs Even More Pathetic Than Your Average Player’s K/D Ratio
Marathon Patch Surprisingly Drops The Difficulty On NPCs And Fans Are Thrilled
Breaking, Games News

Bungie Caves Again, Makes Marathon NPCs Even More Pathetic Than Your Average Player’s K/D Ratio

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 11, 2026March 11, 2026

Well, well, well… look who finally decided to stop gatekeeping their own game! Bungie’s latest patch for Marathon has sent…

LEGO Teases “Bricktendo” PlayStation 2026 Release, Fans Wonder If They’ll Need to Step on It to Turn It On
LEGO, The Master Of Turning Nostalgia Into Expensive Plastic Bricks, Apparently Wants To Recreate Your Childhood Trauma With A PlayStation Set
Breaking, Games News

LEGO Teases “Bricktendo” PlayStation 2026 Release, Fans Wonder If They’ll Need to Step on It to Turn It On

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 11, 2026March 11, 2026

Oh look, LEGO is at it again—because why let people enjoy their actual video game consoles when you can spend…

The Absolute *Shocking* Oscar Winners That Make Us Question Humanity’s Taste
Breaking, Movie News

The Absolute *Shocking* Oscar Winners That Make Us Question Humanity’s Taste

FinnMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Okay, let’s get this straight. The Academy Awards are meant to be the pinnacle of cinematic achievement—the gold standard for…

Resident Evil Requiem Director Spills Beans on Fresh Story Bits and Mini-Game Madness Brewing!
Breaking, Games News

Resident Evil Requiem Director Spills Beans on Fresh Story Bits and Mini-Game Madness Brewing!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 10, 2026March 10, 2026

Resident Evil Requiem Director Confirms More Content Is Coming, Because Five Million Sales Wasn’t Enough To Make Him Rich Well,…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 92 93 94 … 251 Next

Latest posts

  • Election 2026 Might Possibly Be A Tiny Bit Apocalyptic
  • Ben Crump’s Justice Tour Hits Another Snag
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 30 2026
  • Former Dictator’s Go-To Guy Seeks Redemption, Good Luck With That
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: President Donald J Trump named Honorary Chairman of Presidents Cup

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.