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Tag: Disney

Netflix Is Raising Prices Again Because You Clearly Have Too Much Money Anyway
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Is Raising Prices Again Because You Clearly Have Too Much Money Anyway

FinnMarch 27, 2026March 27, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture! Netflix is raising its prices again, because who doesn’t love paying more for the same service?…

McDonald’s ‘KPop Demon Hunters’ Meal: Because Even Satan Needs His Happy Meal
McDonald's Unleashes KPop Demon Hunters Meal—Because Your Stomach Needs a Soundtrack
Breaking, Movie News

McDonald’s ‘KPop Demon Hunters’ Meal: Because Even Satan Needs His Happy Meal

FinnMarch 25, 2026March 25, 2026

Oh, look, McDonald’s has decided your taste buds are too vanilla and needs to drop a KPop Demon Hunters collab.…

OpenAI Pulls Plug on Sora Video App: Because Who Needs Innovation Anyway?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

OpenAI Pulls Plug on Sora Video App: Because Who Needs Innovation Anyway?

Big ElephantMarch 25, 2026March 25, 2026

Liberal Tech Elites Suffer Another Embarrassing Defeat as OpenAI Kills Off Woke Video App Well, well, well! It looks like…

Dwayne Johnson’s Live-Action Maui Makes His Grand Entrance in New ‘Moana’ Trailer—Brace Yourself for Rock-Solid Performances!
Breaking, Movie News

Dwayne Johnson’s Live-Action Maui Makes His Grand Entrance in New ‘Moana’ Trailer—Brace Yourself for Rock-Solid Performances!

FinnMarch 24, 2026March 24, 2026

Oh great, another Disney “live-action” remake, because apparently the 2016 animated classic wasn’t *real* enough for us. Now we’re getting…

John Boyega: Back for More Galactic Shenanigans or Just Messing With Our Minds?
John Boyega Might Return to Star Wars… or Maybe He's Just Trolling Us All
Breaking, Movie News

John Boyega: Back for More Galactic Shenanigans or Just Messing With Our Minds?

FinnMarch 24, 2026March 24, 2026

Oh look, it’s Finn’s triumphant return to the galaxy far, far away—or at least his phone call to Dave Filoni.…

New Shows That’ll Make You Question Your Life Choices and Cancel All Your Plans This Week
Breaking, Movie News

New Shows That’ll Make You Question Your Life Choices and Cancel All Your Plans This Week

FinnMarch 24, 2026March 24, 2026

Oh, look! Another week, another avalanche of TV shows flooding our lives like a dumpster fire we can’t look away…

Trump’s ICE Airport Adventure: Pay Up or Get Kicked Out!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s ICE Airport Adventure: Pay Up or Get Kicked Out!

Big ElephantMarch 22, 2026March 22, 2026

President Trump’s Airport Crackdown: ICE Agents to Patrol Security Lines as Shutdown Continues In a bold move that has liberal…

Disney’s Transformation: From Magic Kingdom to Gas Price Tracking? Chavez’s Ghost Weighs In
Trump's America: Where Chaos Reigns and the Patriots Thrive👋
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Disney’s Transformation: From Magic Kingdom to Gas Price Tracking? Chavez’s Ghost Weighs In

Big ElephantMarch 18, 2026March 18, 2026

Welcome to 5 Things PM, where we celebrate the glorious reign of our Supreme Leader, Donald J. Trump! While the…

‘Soul’ Director Claims Streaming Release Was ‘Heartbreaking’—Says He’d Rather Have People Watch It on a 1980s VHS Player While Sitting on a Couch Covered in Cheeto Dust
Breaking, Movie News

‘Soul’ Director Claims Streaming Release Was ‘Heartbreaking’—Says He’d Rather Have People Watch It on a 1980s VHS Player While Sitting on a Couch Covered in Cheeto Dust

FinnMarch 14, 2026March 14, 2026

Oh boy, where do I even begin with this tragic tale of cinematic woe? Pixar’s Soul—a film so profound it…

Disney’s New CEO: Turning Magic into Chaos – A Tour of the Transformed Parks (Now with 50% More Confusion)
Breaking, Movie News

Disney’s New CEO: Turning Magic into Chaos – A Tour of the Transformed Parks (Now with 50% More Confusion)

Big ElephantMarch 14, 2026March 14, 2026

Oh boy, look who’s finally getting a promotion! Josh D’Amaro, the guy who’s been milking Disney’s cash cow for six…

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