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Tag: Disney

Most Anticipated Games of 2026 (Hopefully They Won’t Release Them in 2027)
Breaking, Games News

Most Anticipated Games of 2026 (Hopefully They Won’t Release Them in 2027)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 19, 2025December 19, 2025

The gaming industry is still breathing, folks! Shocking, right? After a year where we collectively lost our minds over sequels…

‘The Muppet Show’ Returns and We’re Already Questioning Our Life Choices
Breaking, Movie News

‘The Muppet Show’ Returns and We’re Already Questioning Our Life Choices

FinnDecember 17, 2025December 17, 2025

🎉 BREAKING NEWS: The Muppets Are Back, Baby! Because the World Clearly Needed More Chaos and One Too Many Frog…

Dead Island 3 Finally Crawling Out of Its Own Grave—Release Date? Not Today, Zombie!
Breaking, Games News

Dead Island 3 Finally Crawling Out of Its Own Grave—Release Date? Not Today, Zombie!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 16, 2025December 16, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Dead Island 3 Is Officially In Development, Because Apparently We All Didn’t Learn Our Lesson Last Time 🧟‍♂️💀…

DC Police Chief Caught Cooking the Books on Crime Stats Like a Boss
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

DC Police Chief Caught Cooking the Books on Crime Stats Like a Boss

Big ElephantDecember 14, 2025December 14, 2025

Democrats in DC Caught Cooking the Books Again—This Time It’s Crime Stats! Another day, another Democrat scandal. The House Oversight…

New Christmas Movies to Watch in 2025 (Because Netflix Finally Ran Out of Reality Shows)
Breaking, Movie News

New Christmas Movies to Watch in 2025 (Because Netflix Finally Ran Out of Reality Shows)

FinnDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

‘Tis the season for brand new Christmas movies, because apparently, we haven’t suffered enough yet. 🎄 As we plunge headfirst…

Disney Gives OpenAI the Keys to Its Character Closet in a Billion-Dollar Handoff
Breaking, Movie News

Disney Gives OpenAI the Keys to Its Character Closet in a Billion-Dollar Handoff

FinnDecember 11, 2025December 11, 2025

Hold onto your mouse ears, folks — Disney just sold its soul to the AI devil for a measly $1…

Disney and OpenAI Just Made A Deal To Make Sora Into The Next Mickey Mouse
🚨 BREAKING: Disney Just Sold Its Soul to OpenAI for $1 Billion and a High-Five from Sam Altman 🙌💸
Breaking, Movie News

Disney and OpenAI Just Made A Deal To Make Sora Into The Next Mickey Mouse

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 11, 2025December 11, 2025

In a move that has sent shockwaves through the entertainment industry (and probably a few existential crises through the animatronic…

KREATOR Declares War on American Sleep Schedules With CARCASS in 2026
Breaking, Music News

KREATOR Declares War on American Sleep Schedules With CARCASS in 2026

Chord F. DiscordDecember 10, 2025December 10, 2025

GERMAN METAL TITANS KREATOR DESCEND UPON AMERICA LIKE A HORDE OF ENRAGED BAVARIAN WEREWOLVES WITH A NEW ALBUM CALLED ‘KRUSHERS…

“Wasteman: Witness the Riveting Saga of a Dude Who Can’t Be Bothered to Take Out the Bins”
Breaking, Movie News

“Wasteman: Witness the Riveting Saga of a Dude Who Can’t Be Bothered to Take Out the Bins”

FinnDecember 9, 2025December 9, 2025

Hold onto your prison shivs and DOC-standard toilet wine, film fans! 🍷✨ The cinematic event of the decade* (*decade defined…

“IF You Foundation’s Christmas Miracle: Because Nothing Says ‘Holiday Cheer’ Like a Dubious Charity Flex”
Events

“IF You Foundation’s Christmas Miracle: Because Nothing Says ‘Holiday Cheer’ Like a Dubious Charity Flex”

Chuck B. BallsyDecember 8, 2025

🎄 Santa’s Sweatshop: Orlando’s QR-Coded Toy Extravaganza! 🎅 The IF You Foundation & City of Orlando | District 6 –…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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