Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Events

Underwhelming Retail Sales Still Manage To Exist Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Underwhelming Retail Sales Still Manage To Exist Somehow

Big ElephantJuly 16, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest retail sales numbers, and let me tell you, it’s a…

Historical Accuracy Now Includes Slavery At Founding Father’s House
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Historical Accuracy Now Includes Slavery At Founding Father’s House

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest controversy in Philadelphia, where the Trump administration has reinstalled panels about…

Capcom slashes Monster Hunter prices to lure back fleeing fans
Breaking, Games News

Capcom slashes Monster Hunter prices to lure back fleeing fans

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

In a bizarre turn of events, CAPCOM has decided to buck the trend of nickel-and-diming gamers to death, announcing a…

Maine Democrats Frantically Compete To Fill Totally Not Toxic Seat
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Maine Democrats Frantically Compete To Fill Totally Not Toxic Seat

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Democratic primary in Maine is turning out to be a…

Queens Of The Stone Age bless us with another song to pretend to like
Breaking, Music News

Queens Of The Stone Age bless us with another song to pretend to like

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

Queens of the Stone Age, the band that’s been rocking our worlds since the late 90s, just released a new…

Carrie remake departs from novel in predictable cash-grab fashion somehow
Breaking, Movie News

Carrie remake departs from novel in predictable cash-grab fashion somehow

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 14, 2026

It’s time to get excited, and also a little worried, as Prime Video is bringing Stephen King’s classic novel Carrie…

Supreme Court Justices Ask Congress For More Money To Feel Safer
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Supreme Court Justices Ask Congress For More Money To Feel Safer

Big ElephantJuly 14, 2026

I’m sipping on my coffee, and I just can’t help but raise an eyebrow at the latest news from the…

Shinedown Finds Replacement Bassists Because Eric Bass Finally Snapped
Breaking, Music News

Shinedown Finds Replacement Bassists Because Eric Bass Finally Snapped

Chord F. DiscordJuly 11, 2026July 11, 2026

Breaking news: the world is somehow still spinning despite SHINEDOWN bassist Eric Bass taking a temporary leave of absence from…

Riot Mashes Up More IPs Because Originality is Overrated Now
Breaking, Games News, Live

Riot Mashes Up More IPs Because Originality is Overrated Now

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 10, 2026July 10, 2026

Riot Games has decided to bless us with Convergence Fest, because apparently we haven’t had enough League of Legends spin-offs…

Because We Needed Another Apex Legends Crossover Obviously
Breaking, Games News

Because We Needed Another Apex Legends Crossover Obviously

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 9, 2026July 9, 2026

Because apparently we haven’t milked this franchise enough yet, EA and Respawn Entertainment are teaming up with CD PROJEKT RED…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 15 16 17 … 300 Next

Latest posts

  • Tom Cruise Suffers One of His Lowest Box Office Openings Ever
  • Chance Weighs Dropping First Name For The Rapper Moniker
  • Trump Looms Large Over Supreme Court’s New Term Again Obviously
  • Trump’s Charm Fails To Woo Latino Voters This Time Around
  • Baby Painted Purple For Vikings Game

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.