The Trump Admin’s Dilemma: Go Broke or Go Broke Under Water?
Holy Smokes! The Strait of Hormuz Crisis Is Way Worse Than You Think! Holy smokes, folks! You won’t believe what’s…
Tag: Faces
Scary Movie gets a poster — because even horror needs a marketing team to scream about it!
Twenty-six years after surviving the most recognizable Halloween costume in cinematic history, the Core Four are back to prove that…
‘Harry Potter’ TV Show Drops Trailer, and It’s Just Like the Movies But With More Waiting
Oh great, another Harry Potter reboot — because apparently the last 20 years of films and theme parks weren’t enough.…
OpenAI Pulls Plug on Sora Video App: Because Who Needs Innovation Anyway?
Liberal Tech Elites Suffer Another Embarrassing Defeat as OpenAI Kills Off Woke Video App Well, well, well! It looks like…
Oil Prices Skyrocket as War Threats Loom: Global Energy Body Declares Iran Shock More Epic Than the 1970s Oil Crises (and That’s Saying Something!)
Oil prices surged on Monday following threats of fresh attacks on Middle Eastern energy facilities by the United States and…
NASHVILLE PUSSY RETURNS WITH ’10 INCHES OF PUSSY SEASON 1′ EP AFTER EIGHT YEARS OF QUIETUDE
Oh, look! Nashville Pussy’s back from their eight-year nap with a shiny new EP! 🍆💅 And before you ask, no,…
20 US Airports Don’t Have TSA. Passengers There Are Living the Dream While the Rest of Us Suffer in Line
In a shocking turn of events that’s got the Deep State trembling, 20 airports across America are laughing all the…
Disney’s Transformation: From Magic Kingdom to Gas Price Tracking? Chavez’s Ghost Weighs In
Welcome to 5 Things PM, where we celebrate the glorious reign of our Supreme Leader, Donald J. Trump! While the…
Legendary Riff Wrangler Phil Campbell Shreds His Last Chord at 64 – Fans Left to Riff in Peace
The heavy metal community is in mourning today as Phil Campbell, the legendary axeman who helped keep MOTÖRHEAD’s machine gun…
Alexander Bros Convicted of Sex Trafficking, Leaving Real Estate World Shook, Not Stirred
Look at this, folks! Three wealthy, powerful brothers—supposedly the kings of luxury real estate—turned out to be nothing but a…