Hitman Summons Slim Shady: Prepare for Rap Battles and Silent Assassin Shenanigans
OMG! 😱 You won’t BELIEVE what IO Interactive is doing this December! They’re, like, TOTALLY selling out by shoving global…
Tag: games
Vampire Crawlers: Yet Another Poncle Game Announced (Yawn) at the Xbox Partner Preview
Okay, so Poncle, the geniuses 🤡 behind the *totally* original game Vampire Survivors (which definitely didn’t borrow from anything else…
Fortnite Next Season: Quentin Tarantino’s Unfinished Symphony of Destruction (Probably With More Dancing)
🤡 Hold onto your hats, folks, because the cinematic masterpiece that is Kill Bill is about to get the Fortnite…
The Hunger Games: Sunrise on the Reaping Gets a Teaser Trailer (Finally, Something to Distract Us From Reality)
Oh, great, another Hunger Games movie 🙄. Because we *totally* needed more dystopian teen angst in our lives. Lionsgate, bless…
Netherlands Stops Being a Crybaby, China’s Car Factories Rejoice
Folks, can you believe the level of globalist games being played while our GREAT President Trump is trying to Make…
Ghost of Tsushima 2: Electric Boogaloo Coming Next Week, Get Hyped
Oh, NO WAY! 😱 Sucker Punch, those AMAZING devs who brought you the groundbreaking, totally original IP Ghost of Yōtei…
Dragon Quest VII: Prepare to Yawn (Again)
Ah, Dragon Quest VII, the game that promised adventure and delivered… eventual boredom 😴. Back in 2001, I thought I…
Gran Turismo 7 Gives New Players a Measly 1.5M Credits While the Franchise Pathetically Brags About Some “Historic” Milestone
Alright, buckle up, buttercups! Gran Turismo 7, the game that’s been milking our wallets dry for THREE YEARS, has apparently…
OMG! Silent Hill: Townfall Release Date Just Fell Out of the Sky and It’s, Like, Tomorrow
So, apparently, the dumpster fire 🔥 that is Silent Hill: Townfall might actually see the light of day! Get ready…
Texas National Guard GTFO of Chicago, Source Claims
Another victory for the radical leftist judges! The Texas National Guard, sent to Chicago by our great President Trump to…