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Wow, infected libtards sail to socialist paradise
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Wow, infected libtards sail to socialist paradise

Big ElephantMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

It’s 2026 and our great nation is still thriving under the magnificent leadership of President Donald Trump, the best President…

James Cameron Sued for Stealing Actress’ Face and Probably Her Soul Too for His Mega Blockbuster Avatar Because He’s a Creative Genius Like That
Breaking News: Actress Sues James Cameron and Disney for Allegedly Stealing Her Face, Because Who Needs Consent Anyway? ðŸĪ‘👀
Breaking, Movie News

James Cameron Sued for Stealing Actress’ Face and Probably Her Soul Too for His Mega Blockbuster Avatar Because He’s a Creative Genius Like That

FinnMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, Q’orianka Kilcher is suing the big cheeses, James Cameron and The Walt Disney Company,…

Halo Infinite RUINED Forever as Mysterious Halo Next Thingy Probably Means We’re Getting More of the Same Old Stuff and LOL No More Firefight: Gauntlet Who Even Cared Anyway
Breaking, Games News

Halo Infinite RUINED Forever as Mysterious Halo Next Thingy Probably Means We’re Getting More of the Same Old Stuff and LOL No More Firefight: Gauntlet Who Even Cared Anyway

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

Today is a big day at Halo Studios, folks! 🎉👀 Halo Next has reportedly been uncovered by a new job…

NAPALM DEATH’s SHANE EMBURY Loses Last Shred of Dignity While Gushing Over AT THE GATES Frontman TOMAS LINDBERG: ‘He Was The Only Guy Who Didn’t Think I Was Completely Insane’
Breaking News: Metal Scene Mourns the Loss of a Legend, But Let's Be Real, We're All Just Here for the Free Beer 🍚
Breaking, Music News

NAPALM DEATH’s SHANE EMBURY Loses Last Shred of Dignity While Gushing Over AT THE GATES Frontman TOMAS LINDBERG: ‘He Was The Only Guy Who Didn’t Think I Was Completely Insane’

Chord F. DiscordMay 6, 2026May 6, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, the metal world is still reeling from the loss of Tomas “Tompa” Lindberg, the…

Xbox Throws All the Adults Out of the Room and Now the Kids are in Charge and Also They Cancelled That One Thing You Didn’t Care About Anyway
Breaking News: Xbox CEO Asha Sharma is Shaking Things Up and We're Low-Key Excited ðŸĪĐ
Breaking, Games News

Xbox Throws All the Adults Out of the Room and Now the Kids are in Charge and Also They Cancelled That One Thing You Didn’t Care About Anyway

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 6, 2026May 6, 2026

Asha Sharma, the new CEO of Xbox, is only a few months into her role, but she’s already making waves…

DISTURBED’s John Moyer Somehow Managed To Not Get Wasted For A Whole Year And Is Still Alive To Tell The Tale
Breaking, Music News

DISTURBED’s John Moyer Somehow Managed To Not Get Wasted For A Whole Year And Is Still Alive To Tell The Tale

Chord F. DiscordMay 4, 2026May 4, 2026

Wow, you guys, it’s a miracle! 🙌 John Moyer, the bassist of DISTURBED, has been sober for a whole year!…

Oh Joy, Another Overhyped Gaming Summit, NAGIS,Because the World Really Needed Another One with Super Important Speakers and Guests Who Will Change Your Life Forever in June
Breaking, Events, Games News

Oh Joy, Another Overhyped Gaming Summit, NAGIS,Because the World Really Needed Another One with Super Important Speakers and Guests Who Will Change Your Life Forever in June

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 28, 2026April 28, 2026

NAGIS, the most epic gaming event in the history of ever, is coming to Edmonton, Canada, and it’s going to…

Far Far West Early Access Preview — Because Who Needs a Social Life When You Can Watch Robots Rustle Cattle
Breaking, Games News

Far Far West Early Access Preview — Because Who Needs a Social Life When You Can Watch Robots Rustle Cattle

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 28, 2026April 28, 2026

Far Far West is a game that’s so crazy, it just might work ðŸĪŠ. With its wacky cartoon aesthetic, roguelike…

Ted Lasso Is Going To Single Handedly Save Soccer From Its Own Existential Crisis This August Or Whatever
Breaking, Movie News

Ted Lasso Is Going To Single Handedly Save Soccer From Its Own Existential Crisis This August Or Whatever

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 28, 2026April 28, 2026

Get ready for the most epic return to the pitch since, well, the last time Ted Lasso returned to the…

Deep State protects their own again somehow what a shock
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Deep State protects their own again somehow what a shock

Big ElephantApril 24, 2026April 24, 2026

It’s absolutely hilarious to see the liberal snowflakes still whining about President Trump’s incredible accomplishments, even as he’s still leading…

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Latest posts

  • BREAKING ORANGE ORACLE SPEAKS TRUTH SOCIAL REVELATION DJT SAVES AMERICA
  • Oh Joy ‘The Invite’ is Basically Just a Bunch of Rich People Trying to Sell Each Other Stuff Over CanapÃĐs and Pretension
  • TIM ‘RIPPER’ OWENS Exposes Brutal Truth That Your Uncle’s Favorite Band Is Judas Priest
  • BREAKING: ORANGE ORACLE Declares Gas Price EMERGENCY
  • BREAKING Trump Posts On Truth Social WE ARE DOOMED

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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