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Tag: How To

Disney’s Transformation: From Magic Kingdom to Gas Price Tracking? Chavez’s Ghost Weighs In
Trump's America: Where Chaos Reigns and the Patriots Thrive👋
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Disney’s Transformation: From Magic Kingdom to Gas Price Tracking? Chavez’s Ghost Weighs In

Big ElephantMarch 18, 2026March 18, 2026

Welcome to 5 Things PM, where we celebrate the glorious reign of our Supreme Leader, Donald J. Trump! While the…

TESLA’s Next Move: Jeff Keith’s Soulful R&B Adventure Because Why Not?
Breaking, Events, Music News

TESLA’s Next Move: Jeff Keith’s Soulful R&B Adventure Because Why Not?

Chord F. DiscordMarch 18, 2026March 18, 2026

Okay, hold on to your mullets, folks, because TESLA’s got a new album coming, and it’s called “Homage” — which…

US Postal Service begging Congress for cash before mailman becomes a ghost rider
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US Postal Service begging Congress for cash before mailman becomes a ghost rider

Big ElephantMarch 18, 2026March 18, 2026

Postal Service on Brink of Collapse, Begging for Taxpayer Bailout Well, folks, it’s official – the government’s version of Amazon…

Israel vs. Iran: The Ultimate Game of “Mine’s Bigger Than Yours” or Just a Really Confusing Soap Opera?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Israel vs. Iran: The Ultimate Game of “Mine’s Bigger Than Yours” or Just a Really Confusing Soap Opera?

Big ElephantMarch 16, 2026March 16, 2026

The US and Israel Are in a Bickering Sibling War With Iran The US and Israel have been duking it…

Events

Cozy Day Party: R&B HipHop Shindig in San Francisco – Because Who Needs Sleep?

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 15, 2026

R&B Party Returns to SF for 3-Year Anniversary Pop-Up Your favorite R&B party is back in SF for a pop-up…

TAYLOR MOMSEN On Upcoming THE PRETTY RECKLESS LP ‘Dear God’: ‘I’m So Proud Of This Album, It’s Not Like I’ve Ever Said That Before’
Breaking, Music News

TAYLOR MOMSEN On Upcoming THE PRETTY RECKLESS LP ‘Dear God’: ‘I’m So Proud Of This Album, It’s Not Like I’ve Ever Said That Before’

Chord F. DiscordMarch 14, 2026March 14, 2026

The Pretty Reckless is back with another album that probably cost more than your college tuition. Taylor Momsen, the band’s…

Honkai: Star Rail Version 4.1 “Unraveled for Daybreak” Drops March 25 – Brace Yourselves, Light Cones Will Be Re-Rolled Again
Hold onto Your Masks, Gamers: Honkai: Star Rail’s Next Update is a Carnival of Chaos
Breaking, Games News

Honkai: Star Rail Version 4.1 “Unraveled for Daybreak” Drops March 25 – Brace Yourselves, Light Cones Will Be Re-Rolled Again

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 13, 2026March 13, 2026

Well, well, well—look who’s back with another excuse to drain your bank account for gacha pulls. HoYoverse just dropped the…

Xbox Gaming Copilot: Because Even Consoles Need a Hand — Or Two — This Year!
🚨 BREAKING NEWS: MICROSOFT BRINGS CO-PILOT TO XBOX BECAUSE HUMANS ARE TOO DUMB TO PRESS START BUTTON 🚨
Breaking, Games News

Xbox Gaming Copilot: Because Even Consoles Need a Hand — Or Two — This Year!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 13, 2026March 13, 2026

Oh look, Microsoft finally figured out that gamers are too busy yelling at their screen to remember basic game mechanics.…

Events

“When Life Gives You Lemons, Just Throw Them Back: The Hilarious Saga of Disability and Violence”

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 12, 2026

FREE Workshop: Flipping the Story on Disability and Violence with Patsie Frawley and Nancy Fitzsimons Ever wondered how to “flip…

CNN Exclusive: Russia Gives Iran Top Secret Drone Tips to Annoy Uncle Sam Even More
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Exclusive: Russia Gives Iran Top Secret Drone Tips to Annoy Uncle Sam Even More

Big ElephantMarch 11, 2026March 11, 2026

Breaking: Russia Gifts Iran “How to Annoy America” Drone Masterclass Well, well, well — if it isn’t the plot of…

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Latest posts

  • Thune Tells Trump No Again LOL
  • Because You Clearly Needed More FIFA Sponsored Stuff
  • Batman: Because Gotham Wasnt Already Sick of Him Season Two Trailer Finally Arrives to Annoy the Joker Some More
  • BREAKING: 10 Days In China and I Still Haven’t Found the Great Wall or a Decent Wi-Fi Connection
  • Rockstar’s Greed Reaches New Heights with $80 GTA 6 Base Model

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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