Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Japan

BATTLE BEAST Recruits New Vocalist Marina La Torraca Because the Old One Finally Got Tired of Pretending to Be Dramatic
Breaking, Music News

BATTLE BEAST Recruits New Vocalist Marina La Torraca Because the Old One Finally Got Tired of Pretending to Be Dramatic

Chord F. DiscordDecember 16, 2025December 16, 2025

Move over, Noora, there’s a new diva in town! 🦸‍♀️ Finnish power metal juggernauts BATTLE BEAST have just dropped a…

GUNS N’ ROSES Finally Pick Opening Bands So They Can Look Good By Comparison
Live, Music News

GUNS N’ ROSES Finally Pick Opening Bands So They Can Look Good By Comparison

Chord F. DiscordDecember 11, 2025December 11, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: GUNS N’ ROSES 2026 TOUR ANNOUNCEMENT REVEALED 🚨: AXL ROSE TO UNITE THE NATIONS WITH A LINEUP THAT…

Japan Gets Unwanted Shake Upgrade: Mother Nature Drops Surprise 7.6 Patch Update
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Japan Gets Unwanted Shake Upgrade: Mother Nature Drops Surprise 7.6 Patch Update

Big ElephantDecember 8, 2025December 8, 2025

While a real 7.6 magnitude earthquake shook Japan’s northeastern coast, CNN rushed in with its own aftershock: a hysterical tremor…

SOL Shogunate Unveiled At The PC Gaming Show: Prepare To Be Mildly Interested
Breaking, Games News

SOL Shogunate Unveiled At The PC Gaming Show: Prepare To Be Mildly Interested

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 7, 2025December 7, 2025

Breaking News: Some Random Studio Thinks They Can Make a Samurai Game in Space 😂. Chaos Manufacturing (never heard of…

Guns N’ Roses Vomits Out Two New Singles, ‘Nothin” And ‘Atlas’
Breaking, Music News

Guns N’ Roses Vomits Out Two New Singles, ‘Nothin” And ‘Atlas’

Chord F. DiscordDecember 4, 2025December 4, 2025

OMG! 🚨GUNS N’ ROSES🚨 just dropped two new singles! 🙄 Because, you know, we were all *dying* for more Axl…

EXTREME Drops Another Turd: ‘Here’s To The Losers’ – The 12th and FINAL Nail in the ‘Six’ Coffin
Breaking, Music News

EXTREME Drops Another Turd: ‘Here’s To The Losers’ – The 12th and FINAL Nail in the ‘Six’ Coffin

Chord F. DiscordNovember 25, 2025November 25, 2025

EXTREME, the band that time forgot (and maybe for good reason 🤔), has unleashed a music video for their earth-shattering…

Assassin’s Creed Shadows and Attack on Titan Had a Baby and It’s a Free Quest, OMG
Breaking, Games News

Assassin’s Creed Shadows and Attack on Titan Had a Baby and It’s a Free Quest, OMG

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 24, 2025November 24, 2025

Oh, honey, hold my sake! 🍶 Ubisoft, bless their little corporate hearts, is at it again, unleashing what they’re calling…

Sex Pistols (feat geriatric Frank Carter) Announce ’50 Years Of Punk (lol)’ Celebration Shows For Summer 2026 (if they’re still alive)
Breaking, Music News

Sex Pistols (feat geriatric Frank Carter) Announce ’50 Years Of Punk (lol)’ Celebration Shows For Summer 2026 (if they’re still alive)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 24, 2025November 24, 2025

🚨 Breaking News! 🚨 The SEX PISTOLS, now featuring the punk rock god Frank Carter (because, let’s face it, someone…

Silent Hill 2 Remake on Xbox: Now You Too Can Experience Existential Dread for 10% Off
Breaking, Games News

Silent Hill 2 Remake on Xbox: Now You Too Can Experience Existential Dread for 10% Off

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 22, 2025November 22, 2025

Behold, peasants! Silent Hill 2, the game you’ve all been pretending to care about, has FINALLY graced the glorious Xbox…

EPICA’s Asian Tour Gets the Boot ‘Cause Simone’s Feeling Kinda Meh
Live, Music News

EPICA’s Asian Tour Gets the Boot ‘Cause Simone’s Feeling Kinda Meh

Chord F. DiscordNovember 11, 2025November 11, 2025

OMG! 😱 You won’t BELIEVE this! EPICA, those symphonic metal darlings who peaked like, a decade ago, are POSTPONING their…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 3 4 5 Next

Latest posts

  • Turkish President Gives Handguns To NATO Leaders
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS Donald Trump posts on Truth Social on specific date
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS Donald Trump posts on Truth Social on given date
  • JAY-Z Celebrates Reasonable Doubt 30th Anniversary with Epic Concert Moments
  • JAY Z Celebrates 30 Years of Reasonable Doubt at Yankee Stadium

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}